Just.. thoughts….

 urgency that pulls me forward not loosening it’s grip. taking me beyond even what i thought could be my limits of imagination only to show me how very wrong i am… balancing precariously on the edge of reality and slipping out and over reaching for something that continues to elude me

searching perhaps for what is known as sane in places where there is no such thing…or is it that i wish it to be so and cling to a factor that embodies my entire being without really caring where these translucent thoughts lead

needing, craving and wanting yet at the same time not needing, craving or wanting…confusion at times of what and when. the how and where not deemed important yet fate has a funny way of sneaking up on you and taking you regardless of the struggles that ensue

fighting within yourself to see what should have been clear from the onset in the beginning…the journey never really over until your last breath is taken…the soul moving on to another shell and it’s true form taking over the occupancy and continuing to learn

but does it ever really learn that which has time and time again sought? the transparency of the mind through the eyes that are really windows that reflect what we try to hide and often times fail in doing so…..allowing the realism of who and what we are to shine through and take care of our needs when no one else can do so

providing us with knowledge and a growing thirst in becoming whole or complete…can not one do so without the aide of another at their side? i wonder at times how it can be that i’ve come so far in so short a time and think back to when days and nights spent alone were times of thoughts that boded ill for my future

the glimmer of hope that i’ve seen and the ever prevailing light that continues to glow inside me somehow telling me that the path chosen is the right one….but how can you know which is the right path until you’ve stepped onto it and started heading in that direction?

unseeing guides that could be spirits or even angels sent to us from above that keep us on the true and narrow…an inkling of perverse shadows that we know to be the other side forever trying to sway and convince us that we’ve taken the wrong way in our search

the circles that not only these thoughts run without an end, but the circles that we ourselves place us in hoping to break the chain that binds us to this turmoil that we’ve become so accustomed to feeling and experiencing

but we lose that grip eventually and branch out on our own and it’s then that the light becomes brighter inside us pushing away the darkness and allowing us to see that there are other avenues to choose from.. many paths to walk and new experiences to behold