uhhh yeah

So I decided to suck it up and not go to Luke’s for my birthday 🙁 I am really sad I’m not going but I just can’t. I don’t have the money right now.

I told him and he was upset, but I told him that if I just waited a couple more weeks  I could stay for Thanksgiving break (like 10 days.) Then just three more weeks and I’ll be with him for 18 days for Christmas..he was happy then.

I’m getting a job, probably at a sports bar downtown to make some cash, after I turn 21 I think I’m going back to the club to apply as a cocktail waitress..I bet the money there is good. I don’t care if I have to wear a skimpy outfit, it’s just like wearing a bathing suit on the beach, I did live in Florida for two years, I’m kinda used to it anyway.

So that’s that I just pray that I make enough to buy all those tickets myself…I’m doing it on my own! Yesterday my mom was like "oh I think I’m going to put money in your bank account so you have enough for groceries on the weekend" I said "no I don’t want your money"  I’ll eat pb&j’s all weekend if I have to dammit!

I just am tired of them throwing things in my face, like when they help me out financially..I am in college I am broke what do they expect?! At least I AM in college unlike my dropout older brother who is almost an alcoholic and my married stoner sister? Why can’t they be proud of me?

I tired of them..