oh. hell. no.
tis the season and shit.
yeah right.
not to rain on anybody’s parade during this wonderful and festive time of year…i am not feeling very wonderful nor festive today.
and that’s okay. we all have our days where we just can’t get in the holiday spirit.
the good news is we finished all of our shopping this weekend, and i wrapped every. last. gift.
we are completely ready for christmas.
i have that to be thankful for.
but.
well.
chewie screwed up big time last night.
BIG TIME.
we were in bed and i was watching tv. he was snoring away as he always is. i will never understand how some people’s heads can hit the pillow and they can be sound asleep instantly.
but anyway.
i was playing around with my cell phone checking my fantasy football score. i had two people playing in last night’s carolina/new york giants game. and since this week and next week’s combined fantasy score will determine whether i finish first or second in the league, i wanted to know how my players did.
well, the answer is that they did horrible.
i am pretty sure delhomme could use someone other than deangelo williams. geeze. it would have worked out much better for me if he could have shared the love with steve smith, since he is my guy.
i guess if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.
anyway, i digress.
so i am playing with my phone when it decides to jump out of my hand and fly into that magical little space between the bed and the wall. the space that is too small for my arm to reach down to retreive the phone.
so then i got down on the floor and was trying to reach the phone.
still couldn’t get it.
so i wake chewie up and tell him to pull the bed out from the wall.
he does.
i get my phone and we get back into bed.
then i was sitting up complaining about the fact that my fantasy team sucks.
then he did it.
he did the unthinkable.
he said "lyndsey calm down."
lyndsey.
lyndsey.
that horrible, awful, awkwardly spelled name.
lyndsey.
the name of that horrible, awful mother.
i grabbed a couple pillows and headed for isaiah’s bed.
it took him a minute to even realize what he had done wrong.
he came in to apologize and said it was a mistake.
he claimed he had just woken up so he wasn’t thinking clearly.
quite frankly, i don’t give a damn.
my name should be the name that comes to your mind, even when you aren’t thinking clearly.
so i said "whatever garrett," and rolled over.
and that’s how the night ended.
someone’s gotta sleep in isaiah’s bed.
and last night it was me.
he tried to justify it by saying "at least he didn’t call me that while we were having sex."
then i said "hell, if it means you would have sex with me, you can call me lyndsey anytime!"
yeah.
i shouldn’t have said that.
but damn. i need more sex than once a week.
sure, sure, sure.
it was an honest mistake.
whatever.
that’s fine.
i will get over it eventually.
but just because it was an honest mistake doesn’t mean that it isn’t still entirely disturbing.
yup.
pretty sure i will NEVER forget that he did that.
damn.
at least he could have called me his mom’s name or something. or his sisters.
but not someone i detest.
and to make matters worse, lyndsey pulled one of her stunts again this weekend with isaiah.
i will bar you from the muddy details because i don’t have the energy to rehash her stupidity…but ultimately she ended up not allowing isaiah to go out to dinner saturday night for chewie’s dad’s birthday. and she didn’t let isaiah go to the christmas play at church on sunday.
it’s very similar to how she let isaiah stay home from school last week because he just "didn’t want to go."
i guess isaiah makes the decisions when he is with lyndsey. he always wants to be at his mom’s house.
and now we know why. there is no discipline or boundaries, and what he says, goes. if he wants to stay up late, skip school, talk back to his mom – it’s all fine!
at such a young age, why WOULD he want to come to our house where he is expected to have manners and follow the rules and live on a schedule where he has to be in bed by a certain time.
that doesn’t sound like any fun at all!
needless to say i was heart broken.
because when chewie was talking to isaiah on the phone, he mentioned that santa had mailed isaiah a package (another wonderful idea i stole from a favorite: ms tt) and that the package was in the mailbox waiting for him.
isaiah said he didn’t care if he got santa’s package.
i was crushed. i worked so hard on writing a personalized letter to isaiah and picking out goodies to include that were just for isaiah. i spent a lot of time decorating it and including stuff from some of the reindeer too.
i sent a similar package to madaya. her dad says she screamed in excitement when she saw the package delivered from the North Pole. i guess she enjoyed it very much.
i am not taking it personally that isaiah didn’t even want to see his package. he is five.
but what i do take personally is how scary his life is going to be as he gets older and continues to get caught in this mess. it terrifies me.
from time to time i write in here what has happened recently with lyndsey. i try not to write about it too often because it would get old, and frankly i have no motivation. but if i documented all of the unbelievable shit she is up to, i would
a.) never stop writing
b.) go crazy
c.) cry
that little boy is in for a world of trouble. and i am not being an overly concerned parent. i have the luxury of being an "outsider" and i can tell the chips in his life will definitely be stacked against him. especially if this BS doesn’t stop.
i have even gone so far as to tell chewie we need to break up because the reason lyndsey is acting like this is because she can’t let go of chewie and is dissatisfied with her current situation. she hates that i am in the picture. and she uses her son to show it.
i don’t want to be the reason why isaiah endures this madness.
chewie gets angry when i say that.
but it’s true.
i guess if chewie was alone for the rest of his life, or until isaiah was a mature adult, isaiah’s life would be a lot easier.
but then selfishly i think of the fact that that little boy needs someone like me in his life. how do i walk away from that?
i dunno.
but this is becoming more and more of an issue as she realizes more and more that i am not going anywhere.
she has started to tell him bad and untrue things about me that he repeats when he is around me.
kids are smart.
they know who is on their side.
but sometimes they can be temporaily blinded because they are supposed to be able to believe what their moms tell them. so for a while he will be confused until he figures out.
lets just hope its sooner rather than later.
Bad Chewie! Shame on him for calling you her name. As for Isaiah, my opinion is that you should be the best influence that you possibly can be for him, because it’s pretty obvious that he’s not getting good influence from his biological mother. Now thinking that you should breake up with Chewie to save the child is just nutso! Do you really think Chewie will be alone for the rest of his life?No, this chick obviously has some serious problems and the way she is raising her child is going to come back to bite her, and you and Chew too, in the ass. But taking yourself out of the picture ain’t gonna change her one iota…. Just my opinion…
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OUCH! If Eddie ever called me Julie I think I would probably kill him in his sleep. yuck! *hugs* Kudos for trying to be a positive influence in the little one’s life despite everything.
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i woulda kicked him outta bed. let him go sleep in his son’s bed. !!! that’s a BIG DEAL! BIG! How long have yall been together? and it’s still in his mind to do that? It is so ‘you’ to offer to break up for Isaiah’s benefit. i do hope all that works out, in the long run.
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Oh snap! He did not! I do understand a little, but WHOA! He’d better get you something special for THAT mistake!
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I was called an ex once, by BF and his mother… separate occasions. Yeah, it wasn’t too cool when it happened. You should have seen the horrified look on the mother’s face when she realized what had slipped out. lol Funny now but it wasn’t then. By NO means should you leave thinking things will be best for Isaiah if you do. Not true, for in the long one she sounds like the type who will simply use the child for whatever means she wishes, distorting things along the way. grrrr.. that kind of behavior makes me so angry. Sadly, she is not nearly as good for Isaiah as YOU are! I agree with above noter, Chewie better work his tail off to make it better with you~
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Not quite sure what to make of the wrong name deal. Never been there myself. Ummm… yeah. Happy holidays!
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RYN: I DO have a recipe, but it’s just something to go off of. I NEVER measure anything, and always have surplus cheese. haha!
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Oh MAN!
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ouch. that must have hurt.
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My boss is in the same situation with his ex wife and his two kids, I can’t believe how much of a biotch his ex is and she sounds just like lyndsey. And yeah, I would never forget if my boyfriend called me that eithe.r Especially because she’s a PSYCHO. <3
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I’ve been there. The thing is – you said that she’s been difficult lately… that’s why she’s taking up space in his head. It’s Christmas time, she’s being a troll and playing to “win” by being Isaiah’s buddy instead of his mommy, and she’s alienating him from his dad because the stability of his dad’s house makes her feel REALLY threatened. Stand your ground, don’t go ANYWHERE and
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you know, maybe chewie needs an outlet. To vent all of this garbage OUT so that she’s *not* taking up space in his head. Bryan never wanted to talk about any of it with me because he knew that I’d end up highly irritated about all of it… so it built up and he either ignored it, or made freudian slips like the one chewie made….
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yanno what? even if Chewie said “you’re right…the reason she’s acting like this is because of you” and you guys ended it…you KNOW he’d end up dating someone else down the road…and it would be the same ole shit all over again. Only who knows what the new girlfriend would be like. Lyndsey is gonna be a bitch no matter who Chewie is with. It’s really got nothing to do with you.
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(One more, lol) What you said about writing it all out.. you don’t have to do it, but someone should be. Documentation is imperative when the “co-parent” isn’t doing her damn job. If he’s missing school like that – she’s neglecting his development and education, staying up late and talking back really won’t sway a judge, but truancy will. Tell Chewie to keep good records.
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I don’t envy your situation at all…relationships are HARD, even without a psychotic ex in the picture. All you can do is continue to be the amazing person you are, continue to do the amazing stuff you do for Isaiah, and know deep in your heart that you are improving his life everytime he’s with you. Cause you are.
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As far as Chewie calling you Lyndsey…wow. That sucks & I know it hurt a lot. I don’t even really have anything to say other than it sucks.
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That little boy would be a pawn whether you were in his father’s life or not. You are not the sole reason she is acting this way. She is this way because that is her way! I have not too much to say about your chewie callling you by his ex. because I have called my hubby of many years by an ex.’s name in the course of our lives. Felt stupid and cannot explain how the brain farts these names out!
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I might have thrown his pillow on the floor and hogged the covers away from him. I’m way meaner then you though. Sex once a week? lucky 😉 North pole packages? Thats amazing. What did you put in? I’m enamored. It is hard to go agaisnt your mother…what an ugly situation but you are only amazing and loving.Your own child will be a very lucky one. haha if you ever have need to write anything to Lyndsey make sure you make it out to “Lindsey” she will love it I promise. Oh and sign it “Jyssica” I hardly think bowing out would save that little boy though. besides the crying & the crazy part…I would not mind if you never stopped writing. Then I could keep reading and be with you always. Also cracked me up listening to your fantasy football rant.. Your sports nerdiness is pretty cute and only makes you more of a catch. My friend was sending baseball sex metaphors my way and I think I need to watch more baseball its smuttier then most pornos I think… to end do you still have that tricks number…I wonder if her refridgerator is running…. Or haha I could call and say an anonomous partner thinks she should be
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I’m thinking “danielly” and then get really angry if he doesnt realize the “y” is silent. I love the boxes idea. I can’t beleive I didn’t think of it.
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I’ve called exes other exes names. It just happens. I have been called other peoples name it’s not offensive to me unless they do it purposely.
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Well first of all since that is also my daughter’s name (and we’re discussed how it’s also spelled the same way … which is how we ‘met’ to begin with!) I must disagree with THAT thought. BUT … having d=gone through exactly the same thing with my hubby, then bf, years ago, I complained to my Mom about it the next day. Her reply – well at least it was someone’s name that you knew. Could you just
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imagine if he’d said a name you DIDN’t recognize – you’d have gotten no sleep at all last night. Gee, thanks, Mom. Thought you were on my side ? But in a way she’s right. At the time, I wanted to kill him. Did the same grab the pillow and head to the couch thing. But the next day we talked it out. It’s not like he meant to say it to hurt you aftr all. But yes, it DOES suck. *hug* K
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When he’s an adult he’ll remember who was the good parent and who was the fun parent.
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RYN: Yes forgiving was definitely hard but it was well worth it. I didn’t realize by not forgiving, how much it was hindering me in life. Yes, the children do keep me busy and happy! This man is also behind bars and in my case it wasn’t pain inflicted towards me but my child. I don’t know. Maybe one day I’ll be able to face him. (C)
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(cont.) When a man calls his woman a name that isn’t hers, especially one of an ex; is room for a beat down. Shame on him! As far as little man is concerned. It’s sad to see when a parent doesn’t raise their child in a manner in which will help them be self sufficient when they grown older. He appears to be getting away with everything. To me leaving him would not help things though.
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Hell. You need to run around downtown, and separately on some other night, sit and play board games with me, and take a f***ing break from all this. Just to keep some sanity. You walk around with that all the time, you’ll die young and frazzled. Let me know when; I always have time for you.
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Y’know how I’m always saying to go easy on Chewie,,,he’s just a guy and guys aren’t too bright? Wel, as much as I understand what happened from his perspective, I can’t defend him on this one. But for cryin’ out loud don’t break up with him for Isiah’s sake! Sure, you’re the reason she pulls this shit NOW. But what about after you’re out of the picture? Is there any reason to think she won’t
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finds another reason to do this crap? You didn’t make her psychotic. And she won’t stop being psychotic if you take yourself out ot the equation. Isiah needs you, Madaya needs you, and Chewie needs you (even if he sometimes doesn’t deserve you).
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He’s lucky you even have an extra bed! Most guys would have had to of packed it to the couch. Hope you had a good Christmas!
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Ugh since I got my new cell phone I have no ones numbers. Which is fine but I’m angry at myself for not getting yours again. This has been such a long week mostly because NO one on my list is writing… miss you. Happy new year darling
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