All the things i forgot to do

Today’s weather shows a downpour of discontentment with pockets of ennui coming in from the north.

i am not a beautiful or unique snowflake.

i know this because Chuck knows this.

There are things in the world so great, like how sometimes reading feels better than Vicodin. There are things in the world unfathomable, like the talent in the mind of one person. There are things in the world unquestionable, like the fact the words can be composed into life-saving sonatas.

i know this because Chuck showed me this.

i finished reading Diary today.

Today i decided that suffering is never really ending. i then decided that it is okay to be sad. i then decided that success isn’t always measured in dollar signs or mortgage signings or ownership of anything. Success is having a passion and really, REALLY living for it. Even if it gives you no notority, no money, no future, it gives you something now. That silly inspiration.

i want to die everyday, but Chuck will write a new book. Andrea will draw something for me. Brad will play the guitar. i want to die everyday, but i there is so much i haven’t learned.

Passion for that is what is trying me here.

When you’re a horrible author who will do nothing but this with her life, but will not be too angry about it because she has so many book to live for, take another drink.