I didn’t know you were gonna be such a good thing

I realize I’ve been using this diary to do nothing but vent, whine, complain, rant and rave lately. But quite honestly, I’m writing in that precise moment when it happens. The rest of the time, I’m on an even keel. But I also realize it’s been a very long time since I’ve taken time to write down the positives and the things I appreciate in my life. While I do that every now and then on my own, I like to write it down, too. Not just for me, but for all of you as well. So here goes!

1. I love the late night discussions I have with people, whether it’s via Facebook, MSN or even the phone. Some of those conversations have been with some of you and I want you to know how great it is when 2am rolls around and we get silly or serious and deep. I won’t forget those talks.

2. I appreciate having a place to go to vent when life goes a little off-kilter and I appreciate not being judged for being petty or whiny. Thank you, entire OD community for allowing me that.

3. I absolutely love my friends- each and every one of you- for who you are and for your unique talents. Every one of you brings something special to the table and you’re each very special. Occasionally we have overlapping interests/talents/hobbies, but for the most part, all of my friends are very diverse and I adore you all. You’re not just cookie-cutter versions of each other and that’s awesome!

4. I very much appreciate that while I don’t love being 30 years old already and not having the things that society dictates I ‘should’ have by now, I’m incredibly self-aware. I know who I am and what I want. I know what I stand for and how much I’m willing to take before I walk away from a situation. I’m comfortable with my mental, emotional and spiritual states and those are all things I struggled with for the first 22-ish years of my life. I look forward to continuing to make peace with myself and my world.

5. I appreciate that I’m such an avid reader. As corny as it may sound, whenever I have a book, I have something to do. I feel so much more enlightened and enriched compared to people who don’t enjoy reading. I’m not saying I’m better than those people, just that I feel like I have an upper hand because I don’t sit around wasting time in front of computer games or console games. I’d rather be engrossed in a great book instead. And luckily enough, it’s what I enjoy.

6. I appreciate the limited supernatural abilities I tend to have every now and again. I used to question it and even think I was fairly crazy for ‘sensing’ things that no one else knew or could feel. But since meeting a lovely lady here on OD (hi, Nectar!), I’ve come to accept it and embrace it and even enjoy it when it happens.

7. I appreciate that I’ve got a place to live. I may be 30 years old and still living at home because I’m unemployed and it’s so expensive to move out on my own, but at least it’s a roof over my head. I may not love the situation, I may not like it, I may be slightly embarrassed by it, but it could be worse.

8. I appreciate that I grew up to be so much better than some of the people I went to school with. Yes, I said that. And I mean it. But in my defense, I recently looked up two people who I knew rather well all through my schooling. One was arrested for raping a woman as of a couple of years ago and the other one had been arrested for credit card fraud, stalking and arson. The latter was recently found dead in his home, presumably from and overdose and/or suicide due to being found guilty of all of those things. I think that makes me a better person because I made the decisions not to go down those sorts of routes.

9. I appreciate that I’ve been finding all kinds of amazing music on YouTube lately. Mostly I’ve been obsessed with several cover artists and I just can’t get enough. I love good music!

10. I love the night time. My favourite time of the day are the hours between 10pm and 5am and I feel lucky that since being unemployed, I’ve been able to switch up my sleep schedule and enjoy the peace and quiet during those hours. I love solitude and I need it to survive. I get drained by people very easily and it makes me incredibly happy to just enjoy my own company.

11. I’m very appreciative of being able to be there for friends when they need me. Even if they don’t come to me directly, sometimes during conversations, deeper more important topics will come up that they need/want to discuss and it makes me glad that these friends choose me to discuss things with. I must be doing something right as a friend and human being.

12. I’m appreciative and grateful for cell phones. I never wanted to be so attached at the hip to people, but I’ve come to realize that it’s not really such a bad thing and that it just gives me that much more access to being able to tell people that I’m thinking about them or that I care about them at any given moment.

I think that’s it for now. I’m getting a bit sleepy. I plan to do more of this in the future, though. 🙂