Put out the fire boys, don’t stop…

…don’t stop.

Put out the fire on us.

 

 

So it is…

Today was better. I haven’t been drinking enough to even feel buzzed, just enough to not feel sick, and only at night. I powered through the detox in the daytime on saturday…it was so painful, and drank some at night…now I am not getting that sick feeling until night time and I am just drinking less and less until finally I don’t have to drink at all.

 

Last night some friends and I went to this bar to watch some comedy.

I shot blondie a text, inviting her to come out with us, from my friend, Emily’s phone (who has one of the most badass boyfriends ever by the way. Seriously, I just met him for the first time last night and him and I have a lot in common, especially regarding a drug splattered past…I think he will be a good friend in the future.) so anyway…blondie didn’t write anything back so I thought to myself, "Fuck it, I didn’t really even want to get into anything anyway, and plus…I don’t like blondes."

 

Well, apparently this morning Emily got a text back from her saying "I’m sorry, I fell asleep at 7 last night and didn’t wake up until just now! I hope you guys had fun! We should really do something this week!"

 

Hahaha…so I guess I will call her or something.

I am going to make sure the first few times we hang out it is with a group of people…I don’t want to be sending the wrong messages, and even though she is a perfect ten knockout, I am not going to let myself go down that road again right now. I tried in November and it was obviously a failed experiment.

So if after a few times hanging out I kind of get that feeling I am just going to have to tell her what’s up, that maybe down the road something could happen…but not now…

haha. I am getting way ahead of myself.

My walls are just up right now, really high up…and no one is getting over them for a long time.

You just can’t be too careful, and once my walls are up they are impossible to get through until I lower them.

For as publicly open I am about so many things to so many people, when I want to shut someone out…they are out.

 

Anyway…

 

So work today was really good.

I went in at three and I was the only server on for a hot minute…

I got slammed with a 4 top, two 2 tops, a 3 top, an then a 9 top all within 15 minutes of eachother.

It was pretty fucking brutal.

A lot of my guests said the food was bad and cold…which is because we didn’t have an expo, and everyone who was there was just getting off so they wouldn’t help me get my shit together.

At the end of that particular hit, my manager had to comp a lot of stuff for them…but I guess they talked to her and said that I was a great server and did everything I could in a bad situation and they didn’t blame me.

That was good to hear.

I drank two rockstars before I went in…

Then the red bull girls came in and dropped off a ton of those things, so I pounded two.

I haven’t eaten since….

…well, I am not totally sure when the last time I ate was, It might have been thursday.

Anyway, on an empty stomach I was just fucking wired. I mean seriously, pretending to be a T-rex and shit…just rambling and I spoke in a lot of jibberish and I was loud and just…basically had a great time while annoying all of my co-workers.

I made $90 something though…which lately, for a monday night, is a really good night.

So I am going to turn my phone on tomorrow.

Hopefully pay my bank off soon.

Hopeully get my guitar fixed.

Hopefully purchase my math book.

Keep my internet on.

You know…all the good shit.

I am also going to buy some nicotene gum because I’m kind of over smoking, and I am gearing up to record Medicine Head finally so I need my voice in shape.

I just got an external hard-drive from a friend who didn’t need it…80 gigs…so I was able to move all my pro-tools and other music files onto that and clear up some space.

 

So yeah…

 

Things are looking up?

 

Or am I just manic?