Sotto Voce

Life is amazing when you can appreciate the little things. Life is grand when you learn something new every day.

My sinus migraine (or what I deemed a sinus migraine) is finally subsiding after hours of being in motion at work. This is the time in the semester where students wish to come in last minute and have everything completed on the spot and ready to go. Needless to say it tests my patience.  They test my patience, but with every ordeal comes the lesson learned and the ability to handle a similar ordeal the next time it presents itself. Blah, blah, blah…that’s me taking the higher road lol. Truth be told, they suck! They should have been into the admissions office a month ago.

Yay, I’m finally writing. For the last three days I just couldn’t think of anything to talk about. I still can’t, but at least this time I opened the page, began to type and figured ‘eh, let’s see what happens.’

These life changes I made are overwhelmingly positive. Feeling great about my activities and what I put into my body has really provided me with more of a focus and appreciation for life.  In addition, it’s given me more confidence in myself. It’s a constant work in progress and will continue to be for the rest of my life.  However, it’s a project I’ve taken on so very willingly, thus making it so much easier to follow through on. 

Being single has become a choice.  For 3 months now I’ve not had to feel as though I was floundering about in shallow waters, jumping from fish to fish in order to save my life. I’m so very content with the life I’ve created for myself. I’ve given myself goals to look forward to. For starters, I can see my waist line!!! Apparently I do have one and slowly but surely I am chipping away to reveal more and more of it.  It’s almost effortless. The operative word there is "almost."  I realize the work I’ve been putting in, but it’s become second nature.

Another goal I’ve set was inspired by both my friends and Sandra Bullock who is this unforseeable, unknowingly, unreachable force guiding me in all the right directions in this new life.  She doesn’t cease to amaze me, recently adopting a baby from New Orleans. She is brilliant – a shinging light in a world that can always use more. She is wondrous. May the good lord bless her on her new journey as a single parent raising an adopted baby boy.  Inspired by her loving ways, and the words of my co-workers, friends, and family who have always told me I will make a fantastic mother I’ve decided that by 30 I will have lived a beautifully fulfilling life.  I will have traveled, pursued my education as far as I had intended, and partaken in the arts and activities I dreamed of.  By 30, I will be able to look back and see that most of what I set out to do was accomplished with the exception of finding love and believing in the sanctity of marriage.

My love life thus far has jaded me. I accept that I’m jaded and cynical and will inevitably, in my own time, take the blinders off and begin to work on that part of myself, but should that process not begin by the time I’m 30, motherhood will be the journey that takes its place.  By 30, if still single and enjoying the life I’ve paved for myself, I will adopt. I always imagined adopting post marriage and having a few children of my own (2 to be exact), but life doesn’t always pan out as you expected and I’ve been damn lucky so far that it’s gone as well as it has.

So for the next 3 years, my intent is to get healthy, complete my masters (no more than one year left), and follow my passion for the arts to the best of my ability. Be it a contest, my karaoke event planning company, writing a book, community theater, commercials, casting calls, or picking up an instrument, the next three years of my life will be dedicated to my creative side and the undeniable love of the arts that has lived inside of me since a young age.

I’m happy. I can ask for more, but I won’t, because I’m quite content.

Much Love To All My Readers,
The Sinus Rose