Oh hell to the motherfucking no!

So, here’s the story.

I have an extreme fear of dentists. This was born when I went to the dentists years ago and was told that I needed a filling. In order to do this, the dentist had to drill the tooth.

So she gave me a local anasthetic. When the drilling started I could feel everything that was being done. Cue injection number 2. Could still feel it. That lead to injection number three. Mouth completely numb but could still feel every bit of the drilling. This in turn lead to injection number 4. When I could still feel everything that was happening I scared the dentist. Sadly I wasn’t allowed any more local anasthetic and the entire proceedings went ahead with me in absolute fucking agony.

I’m not bothered by the way I look. But, just to get someone to shut up and stop nagging me, I allowed myself to be dragged to the dentist in November. Where I was told that I needed to have some teeth removed. After explaining to the dentist what happened last time, they recommended me to a clinic which specialises in high anxiety cases. I’m not sure that high anxiety accurately depicts the extreme fucking bag of nerves that I am about the dentist but there you go.

So the appointment is tomorrow. I went to the practice website to get their address and stupidly decided to look up exactly what treatment they use for someone like me. Turns out it is something called conscious sedation

For those of you who don’t want to follow the link, they basically pump me full of drugs (either oral drugs or IV) in order to depress the central nervous system. This allows them to use local anasthetic without me stressing about it. Side effects can include vomiting, headaches and amnesia. I will be advised not to drive, make critical decisions, or engage in tasks which require a high level of concentration or fine motor skills for 24 – 48 hours afterwards.

As I said on FB and Twitter: If they think they’re doing this to me they can fuck right off, right now.

The problem is that if I was in fucking agony after 4 local anasthetic injections just for a bit of drilling, then what the fuck kind of agony am I going to be in after getting fucking teeth PULLED? There’s nothing about this doing anything about pain. Just that I might not be able to remember anything (no fucking chance).

They know that I’m there to have teeth removed. They even know which fucking teeth need to come out cos my dentist has told them. Why the fuck to I need to be conscious anyway?

They’re just going to be told straight: they either knock me the fuck out completely or it’s not fucking happening. Their choice, not mine.

(The only other alternative would be to give me a bottle of decent Scotch and let me guzzle it before the op. That way, I may still be able to feel it but I’ll be too pissed to give a good goddamn. But somehow I don’t think they’ll be allower to do that.)

I don’t give a shit what they say about how good this procedure is. I’ll never know cos it ain’t fucking happening to me.

Will


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July 29, 2009

I had some drilling for cavaties about 8 years ago where the dentist didn’t bother to tell me not to swallow any of the prelim topical anesthetic they were using before the injection, cut to a few minutes later of me completely nauseous/sick and them having to wait till I won’t be a problem while they are working in my mouth, on the plus side it went pretty smoothly after that and the dental assistant was smoking hot, she made conversation with me during my being sick and waiting it so they could start, being sick in front of her not so much with the impressing but even better, like a genius I ask her, “Oh, so you are going to college, what are you majoring in?”, the hind most part of my brain was shouting at me, are you f-ing stupid or ?, truly a banner day

July 29, 2009

I had some drilling for cavaties about 8 years ago where the dentist didn’t bother to tell me not to swallow any of the prelim topical anesthetic they were using before the injection, cut to a few minutes later of me completely nauseous/sick and them having to wait till I won’t be a problem while they are working in my mouth, on the plus side it went pretty smoothly after that and the dental assistant was smoking hot, she made conversation with me during my being sick and waiting it so they could start, being sick in front of her not so much with the impressing but even better, like a genius I ask her, “Oh, so you are going to college, what are you majoring in?”, the hind most part of my brain was shouting at me, are you f-ing stupid or ?, truly a banner day

July 29, 2009

I had some drilling for cavaties about 8 years ago where the dentist didn’t bother to tell me not to swallow any of the prelim topical anesthetic they were using before the injection, cut to a few minutes later of me completely nauseous/sick and them having to wait till I won’t be a problem while they are working in my mouth, on the plus side it went pretty smoothly after that and the dental assistant was smoking hot, she made conversation with me during my being sick and waiting it so they could start, being sick in front of her not so much with the impressing but even better, like a genius I ask her, “Oh, so you are going to college, what are you majoring in?”, the hind most part of my brain was shouting at me, are you f-ing stupid or ?, truly a banner day

July 29, 2009

I know a lot of people like you and what they have happen to them is that they are put to sleep totally. This way the work that needs to be done can be and you don’t get hurt.

July 29, 2009

I know a lot of people like you and what they have happen to them is that they are put to sleep totally. This way the work that needs to be done can be and you don’t get hurt.

July 29, 2009

I know a lot of people like you and what they have happen to them is that they are put to sleep totally. This way the work that needs to be done can be and you don’t get hurt.

July 29, 2009

I’m not sure about over there, but I’m under the impression that over here if someone can’t use novacaine they put people under like you do for major surgeries. A thought… but I don’t blame you for hating dentists. In over 60 years they haven’t been able to advance dentristy and are still using hooks and drills. Why? likely cause they don’t want to give up their racket. Yeah, I said it! Later,

July 29, 2009

I’m not sure about over there, but I’m under the impression that over here if someone can’t use novacaine they put people under like you do for major surgeries. A thought… but I don’t blame you for hating dentists. In over 60 years they haven’t been able to advance dentristy and are still using hooks and drills. Why? likely cause they don’t want to give up their racket. Yeah, I said it! Later,

July 29, 2009

I’m not sure about over there, but I’m under the impression that over here if someone can’t use novacaine they put people under like you do for major surgeries. A thought… but I don’t blame you for hating dentists. In over 60 years they haven’t been able to advance dentristy and are still using hooks and drills. Why? likely cause they don’t want to give up their racket. Yeah, I said it! Later,

ryn: oh no you dint. i didnt even see you there. so, if im it and were the only ones playing tag…well*grin* that could be fun. ive just added you to my bookmarks. as for the teeth/dentist thing. i vote for just drinking the bottle and going in that way. good luck.

ryn: oh no you dint. i didnt even see you there. so, if im it and were the only ones playing tag…well*grin* that could be fun. ive just added you to my bookmarks. as for the teeth/dentist thing. i vote for just drinking the bottle and going in that way. good luck.

ryn: oh no you dint. i didnt even see you there. so, if im it and were the only ones playing tag…well*grin* that could be fun. ive just added you to my bookmarks. as for the teeth/dentist thing. i vote for just drinking the bottle and going in that way. good luck.

I don’t blame you!

I don’t blame you!

I don’t blame you!

July 29, 2009

yikes. I hate the dentist too. When I’m in the chair they have to prop my mouth open with this metal thing so I’ll stop biting the dentist haha RE: lmao, was that an invite?

July 29, 2009

yikes. I hate the dentist too. When I’m in the chair they have to prop my mouth open with this metal thing so I’ll stop biting the dentist haha RE: lmao, was that an invite?

July 29, 2009

yikes. I hate the dentist too. When I’m in the chair they have to prop my mouth open with this metal thing so I’ll stop biting the dentist haha RE: lmao, was that an invite?

July 30, 2009

How long ago was the scary dentist? Things HAVE moved on and I have an EXCELLENT dentist who guarantees no pain – that’s his major selling point. I have a code with him too – if I thump on the chair he stops immediately and DOES NOT continue. Doesn’t happen ever because he explains everything super carefully and is just generally v calming. Good dentists are worth their weight in gold -mine actually is because even a check up is £120!!!! Ouch!! That’s the painful part!

July 30, 2009

How long ago was the scary dentist? Things HAVE moved on and I have an EXCELLENT dentist who guarantees no pain – that’s his major selling point. I have a code with him too – if I thump on the chair he stops immediately and DOES NOT continue. Doesn’t happen ever because he explains everything super carefully and is just generally v calming. Good dentists are worth their weight in gold -mine actually is because even a check up is £120!!!! Ouch!! That’s the painful part!

July 30, 2009

How long ago was the scary dentist? Things HAVE moved on and I have an EXCELLENT dentist who guarantees no pain – that’s his major selling point. I have a code with him too – if I thump on the chair he stops immediately and DOES NOT continue. Doesn’t happen ever because he explains everything super carefully and is just generally v calming. Good dentists are worth their weight in gold -mine actually is because even a check up is £120!!!! Ouch!! That’s the painful part!

I detest going to the dentist, but my dentist as actually gorgeous! 🙂

I detest going to the dentist, but my dentist as actually gorgeous! 🙂

I detest going to the dentist, but my dentist as actually gorgeous! 🙂

July 30, 2009

Don’t you just wish they would bring back the gas? Still, having a dentist is a thing of wonderment for me. I have been trying to get one here in Bradford for 6 years.

July 30, 2009

Don’t you just wish they would bring back the gas? Still, having a dentist is a thing of wonderment for me. I have been trying to get one here in Bradford for 6 years.

July 30, 2009

Don’t you just wish they would bring back the gas? Still, having a dentist is a thing of wonderment for me. I have been trying to get one here in Bradford for 6 years.

July 30, 2009

Whatever you do, don’t watch Little Shop of Horrors.

July 30, 2009

Whatever you do, don’t watch Little Shop of Horrors.

July 30, 2009

Whatever you do, don’t watch Little Shop of Horrors.

conscious sedation is actually the closest to being unconscious as you can be when it comes to dentistry. having had to visit the dentist quite a lot in the recent past and being almost as hard to numb, i can say that conscious sedation works wonders. really.

conscious sedation is actually the closest to being unconscious as you can be when it comes to dentistry. having had to visit the dentist quite a lot in the recent past and being almost as hard to numb, i can say that conscious sedation works wonders. really.

conscious sedation is actually the closest to being unconscious as you can be when it comes to dentistry. having had to visit the dentist quite a lot in the recent past and being almost as hard to numb, i can say that conscious sedation works wonders. really.