everything just sucks.

I talked to Josh this morning. 
He said he typed up an e-mail to send 2 days ago, and then their ‘net went out until this morning.

"hey honey things are gettin crazy around here and we got pulled last minute back to nights i dont know how long but incase im not able to get to a computer or phone i wanted to say happy anniversary i know that its been a rough year but hey we made this it cant get harder then what we went through right. i love you and i miss you and i cant wait to come home and see you, mason and the boys.
Love me"

He thought I was upset this morning because I didn’t hear from him yesterday
I wasn’t upset. Disappointed, yes. But definetly not upset.
Hey, it’s the nature of the beast.
And so is this…

hunniebun02 (12/11/2009 10:50:24 AM): so anything new and exciting the last few days?
joshua (12/11/2009 10:53:20 AM): rockets and small arms fires bruised the side of face
hunniebun02 (12/11/2009 10:53:34 AM): you bruised the side of your face?
joshua (12/11/2009 10:54:29 AM): yeah jumped for cover and smashed my face on a rock
hunniebun02 (12/11/2009 10:54:35 AM): owwie
joshua (12/11/2009 10:55:14 AM): im fine just alittle bruised around the eye
hunniebun02 (12/11/2009 10:55:27 AM): well thats good.

Someone linked this on the military spouse forum I frequent.
And then I heard it on the radio this afternoon while out with my brother.

Everything seriously just overall sucks right now.
Not having him here for the Holidays sucks.
Him being there for the Holidays sucks.
Him not even meeting his son sucks.
The boys asking me if Josh is home yet sucks.
Me missing him instead of being angry at him sucks.
Catching a wift of his leather jacket hanging up as I walk past it sucks.
Not waking up in the early morning hours to him kissing my forehead as he leaves for work sucks.
Not working and sitting at home everyday to think about these things sucks.

Everything just sucks.