sweetest downfall.

June 28, 2009

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06/29/2009

I love my new car. And I’m pretty damn proud that I did it entirely by myself.

I let Josh know how hurt I was by the way he talked to me regarding my vehicle the night it broke down. I really wish he wasn’t here right now. I know how horrible that sounds, but let me explain. It is so hard to have him coming and going so often prior to the deployment. It is fucking with both of our emotions, badly. The rest of this week is going to be so hard, and just typing that sentence has caused me to well up with tears. He asked me how we want to do the drop off for when he leaves, and I couldn’t even talk about that without getting upset and having to walk away. He wants us to stop for breakfast somewhere and say our goodbyes there, and then I’ll just drop him off at his unit. "I don’t need my soldiers seeing their command all broken up about this deployment…" It really sucks and I honestly just want him to leave so I can get over the hard part (getting used to him being gone) and get into my routine. I’m already planning his first couple care packages. Yes, I’m going to be one of those girlfriends who decorates themed care packages. Don’t worry, I’ll probably obsess about them here and definetly will share pictures. =)

The drive to pick up the boys yesterday went really well. We stopped on the way home and picked up a ton of fireworks. We’re going to have a cook out, attend the city parade, see the fireworks and then come home and light off our own. We’ll probably start lighting off our own on Thursday or Friday night, though. LOL We have way too much. And I spent way too much, but Josh leaves the morning after… so, it’s worth it.

The boys are bugging me to go outside, and I have to mow the backyard anyhow. So, I guess we’re all getting dressed and heading outside for some sunshine. =)

it doesn’t sound awful – it’s horrible waiting, knowing it’s going to happen, & the days going by uncontrollably. *hugs* xx

it doesn’t sound awful – it’s horrible waiting, knowing it’s going to happen, & the days going by uncontrollably. *hugs* xx

it doesn’t sound awful – it’s horrible waiting, knowing it’s going to happen, & the days going by uncontrollably. *hugs* xx

it doesn’t sound awful – it’s horrible waiting, knowing it’s going to happen, & the days going by uncontrollably. *hugs* xx

it doesn’t sound awful – it’s horrible waiting, knowing it’s going to happen, & the days going by uncontrollably. *hugs* xx

it doesn’t sound awful – it’s horrible waiting, knowing it’s going to happen, & the days going by uncontrollably. *hugs* xx

it doesn’t sound awful – it’s horrible waiting, knowing it’s going to happen, & the days going by uncontrollably. *hugs* xx

it doesn’t sound awful – it’s horrible waiting, knowing it’s going to happen, & the days going by uncontrollably. *hugs* xx

it doesn’t sound awful – it’s horrible waiting, knowing it’s going to happen, & the days going by uncontrollably. *hugs* xx

it doesn’t sound awful – it’s horrible waiting, knowing it’s going to happen, & the days going by uncontrollably. *hugs* xx

it doesn’t sound awful – it’s horrible waiting, knowing it’s going to happen, & the days going by uncontrollably. *hugs* xx

it doesn’t sound awful – it’s horrible waiting, knowing it’s going to happen, & the days going by uncontrollably. *hugs* xx

it doesn’t sound awful – it’s horrible waiting, knowing it’s going to happen, & the days going by uncontrollably. *hugs* xx

it doesn’t sound awful – it’s horrible waiting, knowing it’s going to happen, & the days going by uncontrollably. *hugs* xx

I can’t imagine how hard this must be for you. I am glad you went overboard with the fireworks, you all deserve to have a good time before you say your goodbyes. I will be praying for a safe and fast return while he is away.

I can’t imagine how hard this must be for you. I am glad you went overboard with the fireworks, you all deserve to have a good time before you say your goodbyes. I will be praying for a safe and fast return while he is away.

I can’t imagine how hard this must be for you. I am glad you went overboard with the fireworks, you all deserve to have a good time before you say your goodbyes. I will be praying for a safe and fast return while he is away.

I can’t imagine how hard this must be for you. I am glad you went overboard with the fireworks, you all deserve to have a good time before you say your goodbyes. I will be praying for a safe and fast return while he is away.

I can’t imagine how hard this must be for you. I am glad you went overboard with the fireworks, you all deserve to have a good time before you say your goodbyes. I will be praying for a safe and fast return while he is away.

I can’t imagine how hard this must be for you. I am glad you went overboard with the fireworks, you all deserve to have a good time before you say your goodbyes. I will be praying for a safe and fast return while he is away.

I can’t imagine how hard this must be for you. I am glad you went overboard with the fireworks, you all deserve to have a good time before you say your goodbyes. I will be praying for a safe and fast return while he is away.

I can’t imagine how hard this must be for you. I am glad you went overboard with the fireworks, you all deserve to have a good time before you say your goodbyes. I will be praying for a safe and fast return while he is away.

I can’t imagine how hard this must be for you. I am glad you went overboard with the fireworks, you all deserve to have a good time before you say your goodbyes. I will be praying for a safe and fast return while he is away.

I can’t imagine how hard this must be for you. I am glad you went overboard with the fireworks, you all deserve to have a good time before you say your goodbyes. I will be praying for a safe and fast return while he is away.

I can’t imagine how hard this must be for you. I am glad you went overboard with the fireworks, you all deserve to have a good time before you say your goodbyes. I will be praying for a safe and fast return while he is away.

I can’t imagine how hard this must be for you. I am glad you went overboard with the fireworks, you all deserve to have a good time before you say your goodbyes. I will be praying for a safe and fast return while he is away.

I can’t imagine how hard this must be for you. I am glad you went overboard with the fireworks, you all deserve to have a good time before you say your goodbyes. I will be praying for a safe and fast return while he is away.

I can’t imagine how hard this must be for you. I am glad you went overboard with the fireworks, you all deserve to have a good time before you say your goodbyes. I will be praying for a safe and fast return while he is away.

I can’t imagine how hard this must be for you. I am glad you went overboard with the fireworks, you all deserve to have a good time before you say your goodbyes. I will be praying for a safe and fast return while he is away.