Kids…again..

Update to previous post — pregnancy test was Negative…as I was 99% sure it would be.  I can’t lie and say that 1% didn’t wish it would have been positive but it is best that it isn’t.

So last night we had a good night watching Monday night football.  N was all excited and drinking the bourbon.  When he is watching football and the game starts going well, he starts drinking more lol….so he was feeling pretty good.  If freakin mother nature hadn’t ruined it for me, I would have had a damn good night.

So anyway…..we were laying in bed talking.  He apologized to me for the way he handled it when I told him the test was negative…he was very happy – which I knew he would be and I was mostly.  He told me he knew I wanted kids…my own kids…regardless of what I said and that I couldn’t lie to him.  He said he was an ass for the way he handled it.

I don’t think he was.  We had discussed it.  Neither of us want a baby.  A child yes but not a baby.  As I said, it has always been God’s plan for me not to have any apparently and he hasn’t changed his mind.  No I never TRIED to get pregnant…never tried to have a child.  I don’t want to go through hormone treatments on IVF because my luck would lead me to have multiples and god help the children if I had more than 1….1 would try my nerves enough.

Any way… that ‘s my news.  N is still awesome.  We have been talking apartments — found some that I really like the location but they don’t have a washer/dryer in them….I really hate using laundry rooms.  He told me it was entirely up to me and I could have whatever I wanted.  He really wants to move out though…living with J is getting on his nerves…I understand cause I want to kill her myself.  He always says she is my friend and he understands but she needs to put her big girl panties on and figure it out.

Guess we will see….