Been Starved For Attention Before.

My mother said I shouldn’t have a puppy because I killed all of my fish. But none of my fish ever liked me very much. Except stupid Satellite. Who committed suicide when I left him in my sister’s care.

Coral and Jason check up on me a lot recently. As if I were -their- puppy. One that they left home alone too often. I have no desire to be the wobbly third wheel in their relationship. It took me a long time, but I respect them as their own separate entity. I want no real part of it.

Yesterday I had lunch with Forrest and his little brother Miles. I had fun with them as I showed a couple spots around here. I was a bit sorry when they left. We parted at a gas station and I walked over to my friend Pam’s, eating a strawberry popsicle. Naturally, someone in a car yelled out, "Let me have a bite of that!" which I ignored and continued on my way to Pam’s to pick up my bicycle. I was on my way out of her house when I heard Mario yell from his room, "Is that Leigha!?" I stayed longer and the three of us talked for a while. Mario said I looked good enough to eat. Now, the sad thing about this statement is Mario being such a huge stoner, I’m pretty sure the color of my shirt really did remind him of food. Dead serious. I ended up going to get milkshakes later and that was nice. We talked about my move in with Chris and everything. Mario told me he’s thinking of moving to NYC with some of his friends. I think he’s making a mistake. He’s way too used to being popular here. In NYC, everyone thinks they are just as awesome as Mario thinks he is. He’ll move back home or here after a year, I bet. Maybe under a year. It’s mean to say, but why else do you think all the popular kids stayed in their hometowns? Because there they can maintain their status. There are always exceptions, of course…Everyone goes somewhere else for a while, but not everyone else makes it on the outside. Glad I never really fit in anywhere.

It’s strange for me to even write about someone like Mario here. We’re good friends, but he’s never really been noteworthy. I guess that shows how much social interaction I’ve had of late. Most of my social life is at work…which I had always hoped would not be my life. Don’t get me wrong, I really like my co-workers. But I’ve always enjoyed the comfort of having a social circle outside of work as well. My social circle outside of work consists of Pam….and Teresa when we talk online or the phone. I love them both, dearly. But one is two hours away from me (neither of us with a real means of transportation) and the other I see here rarely. Being more inside of myself has made things very strange for me. I’m already rather reclusive. I’ll get over it.

"They go out every night, his pants are super tight, oh yeah."

**Edit**

Aaaand it’s my oldest brother’s birthday today. Mom bought him a hose. I think that was more of a gift for herself.