I Need A Hero To Save Me Now…

My Dearest Readers, 

I guess I forgot to write again, I’ve been doing that a lot lately. I graduated on Saturday, June 9. There isn’t a whole lot more to say about that. I don’t think that it is going to hit me until August when everyone goes back to school. 

I signed up for classes at PVCC on Wednesday. I’m taking two classes at the Greene branch, and two online. I might be taking Chemistry up at Blue Ridge, but that’s up in the air right now. I’m taking Student Development and English 111 at Greene. I’m taking Psycology, Human Sexuality, and Art History online. This should be interesting, more or less. I’ve never taken an online class before. I’m excited. I’m officially a COLLAGE student. That’s big for me! I’ve never gotten the best grades ever…half my family was so surprised when I graduated. I guess I showed them all up. 

I’m proud of myself. I passed all of my highschool classes. I got an advanced diploma. I graduated. 

On a different note, about a week and a half ago, I’d say, I took the Learner’s Permit test and Failed the second part by one question. My brother took it at the same time and he passed. I almost cried. It was awful. 

I haven’t really gotten a chance to sit down and breathe since school ended. It almost doesn’t make sense to me. Aside from graduation I shouldn’t have been very busy. I am though, somehow. I just want one day where I do nothing but sleep, sing, laze around, and over all just breathe. I haven’t had time to sit down and take in all that’s happened. 

The day after graduation, Father went back up to Conneticut and took my brother with him. My brother will be back by the end of the summer sometime.

On a different note, 9 of my family members moved back up to Vermont. I miss them so much already. I think the hardest part about that is that my 5 year old cousin and her 7 year old brother went with them. I probably won’t see them again for a little over a year. I missed the 7 year old’s earliest years except for a few weekend visits here and there. The 5 year old lived at my house when she was a newborn and left when she was 6-8 months old, I forgot exactally when. I didn’t see her again till her first birthday, and then not again until she was 2 and a half. I don’t want to miss all the little things. They are like a neice and nefew to me. [[The 5 Yearold is JoAnna, the 7 year old is Thomas.]] I don’t think I’ve fully realized that they aren’t right down the road anymore. That’s gonna hit me hard when it hits me. 

I don’t think I told you guys this but, Star is in Korea right now. [[Ninja is too, but we don’t really talk a whole lot anymore so I know I didn’t tell you that.]] The truth is, even though we’ve broken up, I still love him. I’m never going to stop loving him. I worry about him all the time. I know that he is as safe as he can be, but he’s so far away. He’s 13 hours ahead of us. He knows I still care about him a whole lot. I just miss him so much, you guys. 

On another note, I miss Protector a whole lot too, It’s been a long time since he and I were together. I’m starting to forget what he sounds like. He’s been down a lot recently. I know that he’s not going to go do anything stupid, but I want to help him. I can’t help someone if I’m never near them, sometimes facebook conversations just aren’t enough. I don’t even know if he cares about me anymore, but I’m worried about him. His family barely recognizes his existance unless they want something. I don’t want him falling down a bad path, but if he does I’m powerless to stop him. 

<span style="font-family: 'Bookman Old Style’; “>I went to the powerfest with Keel On friday, and with Dr.Pepper yesterday. It was fun both nights. On Friday night I saw Fire for the first time in about a year. He and I used to be best friends [as I mentioned at the beginning of this diary] but we haven’t really talked much in the past two years. I don’t want to care about the fact that he doesn’t talk to me anymore but there are just too many unanswered questions for me to let go. I just…I feel like I need to know. Anyway, It was really nice to see him and talk to him again. He gave me his number, but when I texted him so he would have mine, he didn’t text back. I really miss him, a lot. 

That’s all for now, My loves. 
I will right more soon, I swear. 

Forever and Always, 
~♥EmieLove♥~