::half-smile and a wink::

I woke up at 6:15 this morning, and for some reason, I got up…my brain was thinking high school, marching or Spots.  It took me a good ten minutes to remember that that was over 3 long years ago.  It took my brain a long time to wake up and understand that I’m almost 21, not almost 18, and a senior in college, not a senior in high school.

Sometimes I miss it all, you know?  Our 3-hour long meals at Perkins, pretend weddings in Steph’s basement, scaring the crap out of each other with the Ouija board, our silly fights, and our amazing parties.

Those girls were my life, my support system, my partners in crime.  I’ve filled the gap that graduating from Craig left in my soul – Amber and Kourt and Ty and Maggie and Steph and and Marissa and Katy and Ryan and Scott…but is there anyone who can ever really replace Val and Kim and Ani and Naomi…and everybody? 

I know that life doesn’t go in a straight line, everyone marching to the same beat.  We deviate, we make our own routes, and sometimes, we get lost.  And it’s not that I’m unhappy now – I’ve never been happier.  But there’s no way you can ever (or would want to) forget about the people who you giggled with about your first kiss, cried with when a friend’s mom died, and screamed in the car with on those "I hate the world" days.

My girls made me who I am today – they gave me confidence, security, happiness, understanding, and, most importantly, unconditional love.  We ate WAY too many Pixie Styx, lost countless hours of sleep watching horrible "B" movies, and somehow figured out that we could survive on our own.

Alone.

But it’s comforting to know that we always have the memories.  Sometimes, when the homework piles up and the money runs out, the old pictures from the football games and the sleepovers and the State Street trips are sweet, warm blankets to wrap ourselves up in. 

My girls – I hope you all still know and remember that I always keep you in my heart.  To forget you would be to forget myself.

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May 18, 2005

RYN: Yup – your mom!! This entry made me flash back to Steph W’s basement and her room filled with n*sync! LOL 🙂 Meghan

May 18, 2005

Well, I went to a big university with 90% of my friends from high school (it wasn’t planned that way, it just happened). All I was missing was my best friend. So I haven’t ever really been away from high school people yet to reflect. That starts next year with grad school.