Midnight ramblings

I thought I’d be able to sleep like a baby tonight, considering how crappy I feel, but I guess that just isn’t in the cards…after an hour and a half of cuddling with the tigers in the pitch black, with my eyes squeezed shut, I just can’t TRY anymore. 

I’ve had some strange highs and lows lately.  Not emotionally or mentally, but physically.  This whole weekend, I felt awesome – got a ton of sleep, had a lot of energy, felt ready to take on the world.  But now I’m alternating between shivering and sweating – I’m running a fever of about 102 and have been since yesterday afternoon, though it peaked at 103 at that point.  I had to get up 4 times last night to change into a different pajama shirt because I kept waking up just DRENCHED – I thought for sure that my fever was breaking, but no such luck.  I had to miss the last day at Elm – this was rather heartbreaking.  And, of course, in the back of my head, I’m panicking about my grade for O&P.  I have plenty of hours from other volunteer work, but still…it’s never good to miss those visits. 

But I can’t do anything to change it now – no use worrying about the past, just have to focus on keeping up with the present.

3 weeks from now, I’ll be done – the projects, the papers, the finals, the portfolio ::insert scary music here::, it’ll all be done.  Summer classes won’t start for over a MONTH, and the only responsibilities I’ll have will be at the Children’s Center – and those are the fun kind!  I’ve been kind of overwhelmed with everything lately and a break is exactly what I need to recharge. 

I’m still adjusting to being in a good relationship – things with Mark were dissolving WAY before we “officially” broke up, so it’s been a pretty good chunk of time since I’ve been in one. 

DIGRESSION: It’s starting to storm and I LOVE it – thunder and lightning are awesome! 🙂  Although I’m not a super big fan of being alone during ’em…I’m a little scared right now!

Back to the topic at hand…it’s a process of remembering how to do things – not because you HAVE to, but because you WANT to.  Being a little afraid of messing things up, but knowing that it’s only natural.  I guess it all just seems too good to be true.

Time to get off the computer…my surge protector can only do so much! 

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April 20, 2005

Feel better!