Random “I’m-at-work-and-bored” entry
Ahh, the joys of getting paid $6.50 an hour to sit and play Spider Solitaire and drink Diet Pepsi, occasionally handing out a paycheck or sending a fax. It will be such a change to go home this summer and do 50+ hours of physical labor for 10 weeks as opposed to this office job.
I’m doing okay. It is nice to have my comforting little orange bottle of Lexapro back, but I did okay for two weeks without the pills.
Some things have fallen into place – I have a guaranteed summer job (that comes complete with a $.50/hour raise!) and a guaranteed fall job (at the UC (well, the Info/Tickets desk at least), you have to earn 20 “points” throughout the semester to get hired back for the next semester, and you earn them by doing your weekly tasks, picking up shifts for other people, doing cross training events, going to work meetings, etc. – I’ll actually be getting a raise come fall since I’ve earned so many points!), Mark is going to live in the house next year (nice for two reasons – the DC house is less than a block from the LM house where I’ll be and my social life should be pretty decent with 15 instant “boy friends” and what should be a rather good pledging semester 😉 LONG LIVE WOP PARTIES (let’s stick to under 10 glasses, okay, Scott?)), and I have a major. I’m not just talking about one, thinking about one, researching one, I have an actual declared major. It was so awesome to log onto WINS the other day to check my Advising Report and see under my name “Elementary Education Major – BSE.” It was a great feeling.
The next few semesters also bring some maybes – a bartending job that is a good possibility has been thrown my way (gotta love being certified!) and when I come to school in August, I’ll see if it will work with my schedule of classes and this job. Jon also told me that I might be able to go to HAWAII next winter! When I worked at the station over break, we talked about Luke’s three weeks there and I said, “That’s really cool.” Jon looked at me and replied, “Well, we’ll mention it to Brad, and maybe we’ll send you there in January.” How amazing would THAT be?! Three weeks of sun and OCEAN in beautiful Hawaii! I’d be pollinating, getting my own bunch of ranges and keeping notes and records and such. It’s not the best possibility, but the idea that it’s even out there is just fun to think about. A Colorado trip is also in the works – I don’t doubt that we’ll go sometime during 2004, but it’s just a debate as to whether we take a summer trip (which would cut into work time for both Michael and me) or if we go a winter/Christmas trip. I suppose a lot depends on Hawaii and my parent’s jobs, but I am fairly confident we’ll go at some point. I haven’t been out there since the summer of 2001! I cannot believe that Linds is 10 already! It blows my mind! I’d love to make a summer trip, because if we go around the 4th of July, Kelly’s baby will be almost born/being born/a newborn. At the same time, a Christmas trip to Boulder would be awesome, as I know the holidays out there are busy, HUGE, and a lot of fun.
There are a few down points, of course. I haven’t really made any friends here, just casual work acquaintances and less than a handful of random school and fraternity buds. This can be rather depressing for me, as I am used to having SOME sort of social circle, be it large (as in high school) or small but tight (like my freshman year at Madison). I am hoping that by continuing to work at the same job and possibly getting another job, as well as joining things like SWEA and AEYC (vital to my major), I can work on making friends. I also need to remember that since I just transferred here at semester, the beginning of April is akin to the beginning of November of my freshman year – when I think back to where I was with my social life at Madison at that time, I remember that Amber, Beca, and I were still tentative friends and I still wasn’t all that involved.
I NEED TO GIVE MYSELF TIME (yet, at the same time, get involved). ::shrugs:: It’s all part of the drill.
Also, the only other low point, really, is my weight/body image. I am still dealing with a lot of guilt, anger, stress, etc. in regards to how I look and feel. I was thrilled this morning when I got on the scale at the gym (after busting my ass on the treadmill for 30 minutes) and saw that I was at 141.8, as opposed to yesterday’s 142.0. Yet, last night, at dinner, I was super angry at myself for succumbing to temptation and splurging on one, repeat ONE, scoop of ice cream (and I’m talking a regular sized scoop, nothing insane here, honestly). If it isn’t super healthy, I freak out at myself for eating it. Even if it IS, I still mentally battle with myself over calories, portion sizes, and the times I eat.
I could use a super boost of self-confidence – I really believe this would help me figure out the solutions to these problems. Just a huge pat on the back and I’d have a bit more ammo with which to fight my own battles.
Enough of the unhappy. Time to end this rambling entry on a happy note – in 3 hours and 15 minutes, I leave work and go to Janesville. At 6:15, I will be at Diamond Ted’s.
And not too much longer after that, I WILL HAVE MY TATTOO! Booyah, baby!
And then it’s back here to attend a “Top-Shelf” Date Party at the house – we’re just going to ignore the fact that I open tomorrow at 7:45 AM. 😉
Peace, my hot boys and sexy chicas – I love you all more than I could ever write, ever say, or ever hug. You are my life force, despite the miles between us all.
It’s beautiful outside today – go frolic!
🙂