Last Verse

I survived my first day back at work……

I went back yesterday, after being on emergency sick leave for two months. It was a day I was honestly not looking forward to; I will stop short of saying I dreaded it because dread is merely a cousin of fear and I refuse to fear anything. I will simply say I had become so accustomed to my peaceful life at home that I was not anxious to change that. *sigh* But I did. I tucked away my feelings, put a lid on them, and returned to work not because I wanted to, but because it was the right thing to do.

Everything seemed surreal at first; I arrived at 6am, a full hour and a half before my starting time. Because I wasn’t sure what awaited me, I went ahead and clocked in so I could start to work. Everything looked the same but strangely different. Displayed across my desk on multicolored sticky notes was a message: W*E*L*C*O*M*E**B*A*C*K*.  My daily calendar was still set on August 8, the last day I was there. My candy bowl that I keep for the employees  was gutted, and when I booted up my computer someone else’s name came up on it. Otherwise, everything looked pretty much the way I had left it.

I signed on to my email account, and noticed that my mailbox had gotten full and had actually shut down three weeks ago; I had more than 3,000 unread emails. So I put on a Mercy Me CD  and went to work deleting them. Have you ever tried to skim 3,000 emails just in case there was something you needed to know? It took me all day.

Gradually the other employees began drifting in one by one. I heard excited squeals of "Gina you’re back!!" over and over; at one point people were actually lined up to hug me. It was a sweet reunion, and everyone seemed to want to touch me and tell me how much they had missed me. Most touching of all to me were the people who told me they had been praying for me.

Dr. N sent out an email to the clinic, asking for information about a patient. When I responded back and told him I’d take care of it, he immediately shot back another email: "Gina!!!!!! u r back???? 🙂 "    I replied, "What’s left of me is back. Not sure how much of me survived, but I’m here."  Minutes later as I was talking on the phone, I felt someone hug me from behind, and it was him. I wish you could have seen the smile on his face. He is not ordinarily an outwardly affectionate person by nature, but later as I was walking down the hall to get a cup of coffee he put his arm around me and walked with me, asking me all about my adventures.

And that is how the day went; there were cards and gifts and hugs. There were notes from some of my patients who had missed me, and emails from people on the other floors who had gotten the word that I was back. My friend Cheri came in after lunch, and ran straight  to me without even putting down her purse, wrapping me up in a giant hug. I think I missed her most of all; it is a rare thing to find someone whose spirit connects with yours and that is how our friendship is.

Our patient load was lighter than usual, and I was not rushed or pressed for time. I found that I had forgotten how to do simple things like updating medicines and documenting billing encounters, but someone was always there to help me. It was a sweet day.

I had thought I might have to leave early, but I didn’t. I managed quite well and wasn’t even tired by the end of the day. I was thankful for the conditioning I had been doing for the past two weeks to improve my endurance; I know that had made a huge difference. I was also thankful for those of you here who have been praying for me; I know that made an even bigger difference.

 By 6:30 all the patients had been taken care of and were gone, the doctors were gone as were most of the nurses. I shut down my computer and snapped off my desk light. Looking out my window toward the west where the sun had set the clouds ablaze, I thanked God for such a good day. I had prayed that my transition back into the workplace would be smooth, that He would call to my remembrance those things I needed to know and that He would give me favor. And He did.

There will be many more days there before I care for my last patient, and clock out there for the last time. There will be joys and difficulties, there will be laughter and more than a few tears. But this I know: I am where my Heavenly Father has placed me for now. He has given me the skills and abilities to do this job, and He has anointed me to care for these people. What I have not been so aware of until now is that He has also charged me with impacting the lives of the people that I work with. It is a mission field, and I am a missionary of sorts. And in the few months that I have left there, I must be about my Father’s business.

Thank you for sharing this journey with me.