Sour Sassy

I apologize for causing concern with my last entry. I appreciate all the notes everyone left and I thank those of you who called/texted/IM’d me on FB to check up on me.

I’m pretty much over myself now. I still am harboring some lingering effects but those too shall pass eventually.

Basically what happened was that my husband, being the ASS that he is, got pissy with me over a FB post I had made …
 
24.5 hours worked in a 40 hour time frame. Since 3:30 pm today … Movie time with the family. Dishes done. Kitchen cleaned. Trash taken out. Car cleaned out. Table polished. Place mats scrubbed. Living room picked up. Bills paid (because tomorrow is the first of the month don’t ya know!). Refrigerator cleaned out. Soda’s in the fridge so that *I* can finally have something cold to drink instead of the warm one I have been nursing since 1 pm.

Now may I please go to bed or do I need to scrub bathrooms, do a couple loads of laundry, vacuum & mop floors and cut the grass first?

No where in that post does it mention him by name, imply that I am talking about him. My last sentence was a rhetorical question that didn’t need an answer by anyone in particular. None of the comments I received about the post mentioned him or implied any wrong doing on his part either. But I guess his guilty conscience got the best of him because he had been home all weekend dirtying up the house. Him nor The Child bothered to clean up after themselves at all. And then he wants to complain that the car was dirty & the fridge needed cleaning out and that just pissed me off. And when I’m pissed, I clean. So I cleaned, despite being totally exhausted. It was either clean or cry and I’m too proud to cry.

I had went in to work at 11pm on Fri night, got off at 7am Sat, went back in at 3pm Sat, got off at 11pm Sat, and went back in at 7am Sun, got off at 3:30pm Sun and was sitting in the movie theater by 4pm. It took every ounce of strength I could muster to not fall asleep during the movie. And then he wants to complain about a dirty car and/or fridge?

So anyway, all day Monday I had to deal with snide comments from him on FB that he posted on mutual friends posts about my post I had made. He was trying to make it seem like I was being a hard ass and calling him out and if he didn’t walk a fine line, I would blast him on FB.

And then he did the unthinkable (in my opinion) …

Before you come home all tired again and clean the house, The Child did her best to clean. Do I need to have a wire hanger ready for you, Momma Dearest? LOL

I may be a lot of things but child abuser is not one of them. My child is a spoiled, ungrateful brat at times because I’m not firm enough with her as I should be. She has caused me to lose control in the past but I never once took it out on her. I have never, ever treated her the way my mother did me. That child has never known what a bruise from a spanking is. That child has never had to wear a scar from a cut that I caused her. That child has never been made to feel hopeless, worthless because of my harsh words.

My child will never know these things either as long as there is breath in my body.

So for my husband, a man I have spent and dedicated my life to for the past 20+ years, to call me out as a child abuser, even if it was just in jest (but I know it wasn’t) … well, simply put, it broke my heart. I can’t even remember the last time I have allowed something to hurt me the way those words did. I felt like I had been sucker punched in the worst way possible.

Yes, I allowed those words to hurt me. Granted he never should have even uttered them, especially in such a public manner as FB, but only I control my emotions. I’m usually good about brushing hateful words away and not allowing them to get to me, or get the better of me. I could say it is because of the lack of sleep and all the crazy hours I’ve been working and my body schedule is out of whack and I haven’t found my groove of balancing work and family yet and a bunch of other excuses but at the end of the day, I accept responsibility for my emotions and how I allow things to bother me.

I allowed his words to hurt me. Even though I know better. I know I am not a child abuser. Anyone who knows me, knows I am not a child abuser. I know that they know this about me. So it’s not that I believe that every one now thinks I am a child abuser. I think I’m hurt because HE of all people knows how sensitive I am about child abuse. HE knows my history. Child abuse is no joking matter but to try to joke with me, with my history, is just too far below the belt for me. Some subjects should just be left alone when it comes to jests. For me, child abuse and child sexual abuse are my Achilles’ heel.

So anyway, as I said earlier, I am over the worst of it. The remaining struggles I am having will be resolved also, in time.
 

The Child made it to Ohio safe & sound. My In-Laws met us in St. Louis, MO for the exchange. We left on Thursday morning. I got off work at 7 am & we were on the road by 8am. By the grace of God, we made it to the hotel at 6pm. Not without incident of course. I set up the GPS for him & told him to do what it said and off we went. That ASS stopped every hour. Every.friggin.hour. Normally we don’t stop but maybe once every 2-3 hours. But not this day. By 2pm I was so mad, it was no longer funny. I told him, "Stop this car one more time. I dare you! Stop it one more damn time and see what happens! I’ll leave your f*ckin’ ass stranded!" Normally, it wouldn’t phase me for us to stop that often. Those that know me know that I have a duplicate system in my right kidney so I pee more often than the normal person because I have to drink more fluids than the average person because I dehydrate quicker than the average person. But seeing as how I had worked all night long and was trying to sleep in the car, him stopping so much was not a good thing for me. The more he stopped, the harder it was to wake up & get out of the car (I couldn’t allow my 11 year old daughter to go into restrooms without me!!!). By the 2pm stop I had the shakes so bad, my vision was blurry and my head pounded worse than a migraine. I couldn’t even walk a straight line.

So we made it to the hotel & immediately The Child had to go swimming. So I sat at the pool with her while he "rested from the long drive" & then we went & got dinner & stopped at Walmart for snacks for our hotel room. Then she wen

t swimming some more while he "rested from the long drive" some more. At 10pm I finally had to tell her no more. I couldn’t do "life" any longer and made her get out. I can’t even remember walking back to the room and crawling in the bed.

Friday we toured the St. Louis Arch while waiting on his parents to arrive. Thank God I don’t have to experience going up to the top of it ever again. Yes, we had an enjoyable family day, just the 3 of us. We went back to the hotel and let her swim for a while and then we all went out to dinner, came back & let her swim some more and then we all went to bed.

Got up Sat. morning, ate breakfast at the hotel and then we hit the road … her with them, us without her. Got home at 8:30pm so that I could be to work at 7am on Sunday.

Of course, The Child would develop swimmers ear and was miserable the first 3 days she was there lol. But she’s back to normal, having the time of her life, too busy to call a Mama to say hi or anything lol.

I’m glad one of us is having fun lol

Work is still going good. I’m working crazy hours of course. The new (4th) schedule change goes into effect on Monday & I will officially be working 40 hours now. So much for enjoying any time to myself while she is gone. But we need the money. So money wins. The schedule will have to change again when she comes back from Ohio because they have me working 2 daytime shifts during the week & I won’t be able to do that when she gets home. Hopefully the 3-11pm girl will switch with me those 2 days otherwise I’ll have to lose out on those 2 days of pay. I’m just working as a 2nd body for the manager so she can do manager things without having to work the desk also at the same time so it won’t be like the shifts will be uncovered. She’ll just have to make do without me. I’m not leaving The Child alone by herself for 8 hours each day and I don’t want to have to deal with bringing her to work with me & listening to her whine how bored she is. Unless Joleen wants to baby sit her … but it would be just more easier for Nikki to switch shifts with me. We’ll see what happens.

Good thing about going up to 40 hours is that I now can NOT go with Hubby to pick her up in St. Louis in a couple of weeks. Because my 2 days off will not be together. One is a day I get off at 7am so I will sleep most of my day off. Then the next day off will be 3 days later. I totally hate not having days off together but a paycheck is a paycheck.
 

Apparently I’ve been getting rave reviews from the guests. The owner called me one evening at work to thank me for being such a dedicated employee and for developing such good relationships with the guests. He said he had been getting nothing but compliments about me from the guests and from his mother (Joleen) and he wanted to personally thank me. Uhm, ok. Raise maybe?? lol Who knew that lonely men would enjoy me fussing at them to behave and push their chairs in at the table when they are done eating/drinking/playing poker or clean up their own messes, or to reach behind the counter and get their own damn cereal themselves, etc.

I had one guest call down the other night to ask for a 5am wake up call. I had originally checked him in last week so we talked/caught up for a few minutes and then when I confirmed putting the wake up call in the computer system he said, "No, no! I want you to personally come knock on my door and wake me up instead of a phone!" Ha! Ask him how well that worked out for him. LOL

I love joking around like that with everyone. I still am "avoiding" rm #205 (who is now rm #114) as much as possible. Since his wife came to visit, he seems to be behaving around me. We’ll see how long that lasts. He’s decided to become my personal savior and protector from one of his co-workers that he had a falling out with. Which is silly but if it keeps him distracted so be it. I personally have no issues with rm #313 but I’m smart enough to make sure that none develop either since a few of the windmill guys informed me of rm #313’s temper last week before he had even checked in or that I knew he would be checking in to our hotel.

Now he (rm #313) is putty in my hands. He brought me down scrambled eggs and bacon for breakfast this morning, that he cooked while the rest of his crew just stood there and drooled, while eating cold cereal LOL Except for #114. He was giving #313 dirty looks behind his back lol

You can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.

Room #116 has offered to come re-do all of our electrical sockets for free for us. There are 2 outlets in the living room that only the bottom plugs actually work and all of the outlets in the house are upside down (the 3rd prong is on top instead of on bottom and it drives me batty!). I thought that was very nice of him to offer to come do that, for free, on his only day off but I think it is because he is secretly sweet on me. I don’t want to give him any encouragement or be beholden to him so I am going to turn down his offer. But damn … in a perfect world, how nice would that be! Especially when it will be forever and a day when we can afford an electrician to come do the work for us.

Now if I can just get the inner office shenanigans to stop. Joleen has her panties in a wad over Rachel (the manager) not doing her job or doing her job properly. She has been confiding a lot of stuff in me that I probably have no business knowing since I am only a little peon worker. But Joleen trusts my judgement due to my previous experience. It took a while for me to catch on to what she was doing because she would start out by asking me questions making me think she was confused or trying to learn it herself. We all know that Rachel is not a good "trainer". She doesn’t have the patience to go through things slowly till you catch on. I take the time to teach Joleen when she asks. However, she’s asking because she’s convinced Rachel is doing it wrong or neglecting her duties and only after I have confirmed Joleen’s suspicions, do I realize what I have done. Talk about being put smack dab in the middle of a war you aren’t even fighting in …

Joleen called me at 5:30 am yesterday morning, from her room on the 2nd floor, on her cell phone because she didn’t want it on the surveillance camera’s that she was talking to me that early in the morning without making Rachel suspicious (Rachel goes back & reviews the evening & night shift footage to make sure the desk clerks aren’t doing anything they aren’t supposed to be doing or in my case, making sure I am not taking more than my once every 2 hour smoke breaks. Which Joleen informed me Rachel was doing and has now made it her (Joleen’s) personal mission to come down in between my allotted smoke breaks to give me an extra one LOL). Anyway Joleen wanted a "What would you do in this situation" advice. When I told her what I had done at previous hotels, 16+ years ago, she agreed that that is what she would have done also and then proceeded to tell me what had brought on the secret phone call. Once she cleared her chest, I reminded her that the phone system keeps a log of all incoming and outgoing phone calls so if Rachel were to check, she would see that s

he called and for how long, especially since the video footage would show me on the phone lol Bless her 75 year old heart … she would never make a good spy lol

So then that afternoon, I get a mass text message from Rachel asking all of us who all wanted extra hours. I said I did and when I asked why she said it was because Bill wanted her to be more in the hotel than at the desk and that he wanted extra coverage on the evening shift but since she works the day shift, she can’t be working 16 hour days so by having an extra person on the day shift, she can be around for a few extra hours on the evening shift to help with check ins. I’m gettin’ paid so that is all that matters to me. Honestly, I think Bill (the owner) needs to hire an Assistant Manager but since he is around pretty often helping out (he is the "maintenance man" for the time being lol), I can understand why he doesn’t . The joys of being an independent, privately owned hotel …

So now I think I am all caught up. I would go crawl back in bed since I got very little sleep the past 2 days but Hubby is laid up in the bed, on drugs, with a soft cast on his left hand/forearm. He fractured his thumb at work and now has to consult with an ortho surgeon about possible surgery. If he loses his job, I’ll scream bloody murder! This is the 3rd worker’s comp issue he has had in less than a year. We can’t afford financially for him to lose his job or even be out of work over this. Anyway, since the dog has to sleep in the bed with me, I don’t want her or I rolling over on his hand or jarring it or what have you so the dog & I are going to sleep in my chaise in the living room. Then I will be getting up with him in the morning (who needs to sleep in on their day off anyway?) to help him shower & dress for work. So much for enjoying my last consecutive days off to myself while The Child is in Ohio. I can rest and get a break when I’m dead right?

Till next time ….

 

 

 

Sassy Moments Photography

 

 

Promote Your Page Too