Another New Semester
This semester in college I was able to take some of the classes I really wanted to take. Some were a great disappointment, but Video production and editing was one I enjoyed…
On Monday’s and Wed’s Don and I car pooled with Paul. Don didn’t drive and it had started when I was without a car, so it just continued. This semester, Paul’s class ended earlier so he waited around for Don and I to get out of our last class each day.
My first assignment was a group assignment to film a silent movie with a basic story somewhere on campus. We had two class periods to do this assignment. Needing an extra person for our shoot, I recruited Paul, who I thought had nothing better to do. I just assumed he spent the time finding a better spot to park his car closer to the buildings than where we parked when we got to school.
In our story, our girl is walking through the campus. And the villain, played by me runs by and steals her pocketbook. Paul chases me down and is the hero. I wrote it that way, because it made it a good sell to Paul and also tried to bring his self esteem up a little. He was always grumpy, but as of late he had been grumpier. The grumpier he was, the more we would have to hear Billy Joel’s “River of Dreams” play on his car tape deck… over and over again.
The video went well and we finished early both days which was good because Paul had something to do. That first day, as we walked back towards the car, we ran into a girl Paul knew and ended up walking her to her class. Their conversation was boring as hell.
“What did you do this weekend?” Paul asked.
“Oh, nothing. I watched ‘Cocktail’ on television.” was her reply.
“Friday! On NBC! So did I. Then I went to Blockbuster and rented it so I could watch it unedited.”
“That’s cool” she answered.
But that wasn’t cool. There was nothing cool about it. But for me, this was a “Back To the Future” game of trying to get them together.
It turned out that he always moved his car with a purpose. So he could “bump into” a girl he met in one of his classes earlier in the year. Usually, he would walk her to her class after running into her in the parking lot.
I told him he should ask her out or something. Either way, talking about her on the ride home put him in a good mood and we didn’t have to hear that song. I even agreed to have Dena and I go on a double date with them if he did muster the courage to ask her out. By now I was so tired of hearing about his month and a half relationship with Carrie three years ago, anything would be a welcome change.
That Thursday, we quickly wrapped our video shoot, Paul got his stupid car in position and we waited. No matter what, Paul needed to ‘be cool’. Paul planned for me to stay at the car. He left the keys so I could listen to the radio, but I had no intention of staying behind. I was going to spy from a distance.
When the girl showed up Paul started to walk her to class. She turned to ask if I was coming, and Paul said “No!” and tried pulling her away.. Ugggh.
As I tried to pull the keys out she turned and said, “Your hazard lights are on”
“I have hazard lights?” Paul asked. Double Uggggh…
They left out of view… and I followed with all the mocking stealth of Marty McFly in Back To the Future II. When they got to the building, the went into the elevator and I ran up the stairwell. As I raced up the steps I ran directly into Suzanne from the Worst Date Ever (See Entry: 9/8/11). I hadn’t seen her really since that episode. Maybe one on the football field Senior year, but we barely said Hi.
When she saw me she had a beaming smile and said “Hi there” Meanwhile the only thing I could think was ‘what the hell is this karmedic (Comedic Karma) Crap?’
<span style="mso-spaceru
n: yes”> Our exchange was short and pointless, but it made me miss the storyline unfolding upstairs, and Paul was probably already back at the car. So I headed back. Paul wasn’t there but I ran into Don. I guess things went well if Paul wasn’t back yet we thought.
When he did get back, he recanted his story. He finally asked her out for that Friday and she said “okay, I guess. Call me.” But she never gave him her number. Don and I gave knowing looks to each other.
When he realized he didn’t get her number, he went back for it. She said “Oh, yeah. Right.” Don and I looked at each other again. Even Paul sensed there was a lack of interest even as he told the story, but Don and I played up the good parts to avoid The Song. I told Paul to call me when he finalized a time for the date and Dena and I would be there.
The weekend came and went and Paul never called me. The following Tuesday, on the way to school, I asked Paul how things went. And it went like this.
- He called her and got her answering machine. He left a message.
- She didn’t call back within the hour, so he called again and got her mom. Her mom said she was out getting her hair done. “I left a message, but I think I fucked up my number on the message I left.”
- By now it was almost 10PM and he called again and her sister said she was out getting her car fixed.
There may have been some more calls, but those were the highlights… Anyway, we heard “River of Dreams” 4 times on the way to class. Paul was pissed at her, but I told Paul to forget it and just be friends with her then.
Paul ruined that by yelling at her that afternoon when she arrived for her class. I told Paul how unclassy that was while he kept turning on River of Dreams up in volume to avoid the conversation. In the end I convinced Paul to apologize to her ASAP, but under no circumstances call her to do it.
Thursday came and on the way to class Don and I reiterated the humble apology angle he should pursue. As I got out of Video production class that afternoon, Paul came up the path and met me halfway. Odd. He was in a daze and freaked out.
“You won’t believe what just happened.” He said. I could and I would.
“Three campus Security cars surrounded my car as I was sleeping.” Apparently, there was a complaint filed against him for “stalking and harassing.” I just started laughing and kept thinking ‘That’s it! That’s what you’ve been doing to me. I just accepted it as the norm after all these years.’
“This isn’t funny. I’m in real trouble here. I could be expelled. I’m supposed to have a meeting with the Dean.”
“Didn’t you apologize to her like we told you to?” I asked.
“Yes”
“What did you say?” knowing something was being omitted.
“I told her I was sorry and I asked her why she stood me up, and I started yelling at her again.”
“Wow, that sucks. Well, Let me go look for Don so we can go”
“Don’t tell him.” I told him I wouldn’t.
When I saw Don, I said. “You’re not going to believe this.”
“Yes, I will” I retold the story and Don laughed. I told him that I wasn’t supposed to say anything, but Don and I had a rule to warn each other if Paul was going to be in a bad mood.
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt”> We listened to River of Dreams in silence until Don asked Paul if he wanted to go to some comic convention in New Jersey and I chimed in, I don’t know if Paul’s allowed to leave the State until his hearing with a chuckle.
“Shut up” Paul scolded.
“What’s he talking about?” Don faked.
Paul finally had to tell him.
Later that evening, Paul told me he had told his mom. I asked what she said.
“She was like you. She just laughed.”
I still find it funny.
The next few weeks Paul was in a foul mood over all of this.
I started as a sympathetic ear about how he doesn’t have a girlfriend like everyone else. “Even George is dating girls and he’s obnoxious.”
I hit my breaking point and told him everything that was wrong with him. George is funny and has a personality. Same with Jay. Your problem is you are so grumpy and depressing. As we wandered around the campus, we ran into Mark walking to class, and he just said, I could hear me berating Paul from a mile away. I proceeded to fill Mark in and Paul got huffy. I used this stalking event as an example. If it was me, I’d use this story as an anecdotal story to break the ice or to entertain. He didn’t even want to talk about it. And Mark was another great example. Mark was a jerk, but he knew his shortcomings and used them to his advantage. At our many parties we all made our presence known and Paul was always just there. With our group you needed personality and Paul needed to step it up a notch. I really hoped he had got something from my tirade… but now I know better.