Parties I

  The whole period after Dena and I broke up was one big ‘coming out’ social event for me. Being with an anti-social girlfriend for a year really took a toll on my social life. For years I was considered the social director for my friends. I had taken a back seat, but now I was back. It started in late spring when I was asked by Laurie to take her to her Prom. In our limo would be Jean and our friend Don.

  Don had been dating a girl named Fran who was horrible. We just referred to her as Yoko. Now that they were finally broken up (for good this time) he wanted to show her up at her own prom.

   The first party we had after Michelle got out of the hospital was a Memorial Day BBQ. She still had her hospital bracelet around her wrist. I took her with me on a snack run. A child was watching her extreme limp as most of her left side was still somewhat paralyzed and she turned to the poor boy and said "Wear your seatbelt, kid".That was when I first noticed that Michelle did have a different personality since the accident. Not bad, just different. She said a plate in the head changes a person, and I’m sure she is right. She started getting lots of piercings everywhere, broke up with her boyfriend from the accident and became a lesbian for about a year.

 

  Shortly after that, Matt, whom was house sitting his Aunt and Uncle’s house out in the Hamptons, decided to host a huge extended weekend party that he affectionately called on his invitations “The Rumpus in the Hamptons” with detailed directions and accompanying map off of a photo copied atlas highlighting the road to take. It highly specified a warning about a dangerous curve and to turn left at a windmill that nobody ever saw.

  Sean and I had work that Saturday morning and would miss the first night, so Friday night, we went grocery shopping for our supplies, which would include, most disastrously, our “Breakfast of Champions,” Cookie Crisp and Beer. Dan had asked if I could drive his newest girlfriend, Christine, and her friend Danielle, to the house. Dan had already gone and brought that damn camper.

   I didn’t see a problem with that as long as I could still play “Dead Man’s Curb” at a high volume when approaching the ‘Dangerous Curve’. (I’m all for the theme music).

  I picked them up and we were on our way. I put Christine in charge of navigating and gave her the map and instructions. Then, I kept driving east. And driving and driving. Despite having all of those photocopied maps, Christine never flipped them when we got to the next page. After constantly making sure we were alright, we were now 5 miles away from the eastern most point of Long Island. We missed our turn way back there.

  I asked her why she didn’t say anything and she said she couldn’t read maps. Something she could have told us hours ago and every hour since. I demoted her into the back seat. Danielle moved into the front seat and was an awesome navigator, although she did roll her eyes when I played ‘Dead Man’s Curb’ at the appropriate time. A good time was had by all. Highlights included: Denver’s girlfriend (aka Don’s sister) Kristine passed out feet in the air by falling backwards over a picnic bench, like she did Memorial Day weekend as well. Dan’s girlfriend Christine confessed to me that she has trouble staying faithful and feared she would someday cheat on Dan when she goes off to college. Mark’s ex-girlfriend, Dana and another girl went off to flash mailboxes. And I woke up the next morning on the floor with a German Sheppard sharing my pillow.

   The 4th of July was again my turn to host the party. The U.S. was hosting the World Cup in which we were just eliminated. Nonetheless, everyone had soccer on the mind.

   Sean and I wanted to play Wiffleball, but we were outvoted. So we all went to the local park to play soccer. Dan played goalie and came fully prepared with a soccer ball and cleats. The rest of us, not so much. We didn’t play for long before Dan and I collided. Not so much collided as he planted his foot and I tripped over it. Everyone heard a snap and I felt a lot of pain, but Dan dropped to the ground fast. Being almost twice my size everyone feared the worst for me, but it turned out it was Dan’s leg that broke cleanly in two. Someone went to a nearby house to call an ambulance while others tried to make him feel comfortable. The rest of us sat Indian style on the ground like we were taught to do in Little League Soccer.

  After a very short time, a police car pulled up and two police officers started coming over. Dan immediately requested that someone hide his milk crates that we were using as goal posts because it was against the law to use them in any other capacity. We informed him that we doubted the police cared.

  The cops came and started to ask him his info and in the middle Dan called out ‘Those kids are shooting off fireworks on the other side of the park and the police are questioning me.’

  Finally, an ambulance showed up, they prepare him for a gurney and when they lift him and put him on, the wheel fell off and Dan turns and looks and just said, “Budget cuts, huh?”<

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  George drove Dan’s car (with his precious milk crates) back to his parents house while the rest of us went back to my house to party. Dan’s girlfriend, Christine came back to the house and spent the evening questioning whether or not she was a bad girlfriend for not going to the hospital with Dan. The answer is yes, but who were we to judge as the rest of us partied.

  The next day I stopped by his house to drop off a board game on my way to my yearly family vacation to Vermont. He was in a full leg cast an was going to be in it for the rest of the summer. As I drove away to enjoy the rest of my summer, I did feel a little guilty…

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