Ok…

Sorry about that guys. Just had to blow off some steam. I feel better!

So, he e-mailed me today and dropped a hint in his e-mail that he was reading my diary. I’m really not upset about it. I am kind of glad. I’m glad I have that little bit of a hold left, y’know? And I meant every word of what I wrote.

This is MY diary and he has no right to get childish about anything that I write in here.

I was e-mailing him to see if he was going to send me my things that I asked for. And he would never e-mail me back because of something I wrote in here. Well, I’m not going to be sorry for the way I feel. I’m sure he has said alot of shit about me since I left.

There’s only one person who reads my diary who actually knows me. And she never met Pete. So what does he have to be upset about? Nothing!

I could be a bitch and tell his mom the secret he’s been keeping from her since the day we met. But I won’t. I don’t want to ruin his life, he’ll do a fine job of that on his own. I do want him to realize that what he did was WRONG. That everyone else in the world is not an asshole. And that he needs to make himself happy, or he never will be.

There are 2 things that really pissed me off about our breakup: the fact that he was already sleeping with someone before I left (actually, the day he told me he wanted me to leave), and what he said about our cats. I was worried that he wouldn’t let me take both the cats. So I asked him if he was going to give me any trouble about it. He said, “No. You can have them. It’ll be less money I’ll have to spend.” That really pissed me off. But I shouldn’t have been surprised. The only things in life that make Pete happy are things that have dollar signs attached.

I know there are men out there who aren’t true assholes. And I wish they would beat the piss out of men who give them a bad rap (like Pete). It will be a long time before I ever trust a man again. I’ve seen too many alcoholics, drug addicts, wife beaters, and just plain pieces of shit to want anything to do with men for a while. And no I’m not going lesbian either! Women are evil! We can be so mean! lol

I know that right now I am hurting deeply. But, I will eventually get over that hurt and move on with life.