January 29, 2018

Survey time… to get the gears going again

I totally pinched this survey from @Almost_Blue (thanks!) and, like her, wanted to get my OD gears going again.

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1. Three things I want to say to three different people. I love you. I miss you. I wish we were okay again.

2. One of my insecurities. I always worry people will see me as a know-it-all because I have this awful habit of chiming in on things. I think this habit stems from this deeply rooted desire to be accepted because I was definitely the odd man out growing up. I didnt connect with anyone so I am trying to make up for it somehow. That being said, I do know how to keep my mouth shut and I am a good listener.

3. What turns me on. Submission and excellent conversation. <— gotta keep this.

4. One of my bad habits. I’m a chronic over achiever and while it may not seem like a bad habit, it can definitely cause some craziness in my life.

5. Who I wish I could be. I want to be the best possible version of myself… a version of me who has reached all of her goals.

6. Where I want to be right now. Home home. I love Utah but I certainly miss those West Virginia hills and the people I left behind.

7. The last thing I ate. I think it was a rice cake with peanut butter. Honestly, I can’t remember.

8. Sexiest person that comes to my mind immediately. Oh gosh, I’d really have to think about this. I love Gerard Butler, Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Jason Momoa, Henry Cavill, and so many others.

9. What song I’m currently listening to. Nothing… does audible count? If so, I am listening to Orphan #8

10. The last time I cried and why. I can’t even remember. I don’t cry much.

11. Something I’m excited about. I’m excited for this to be back and I have a study group tomorrow with some cool people.

12. 5 things I like about myself and 5 things I dislike about myself.
Like:

I’m smart. The more people I meet, the more I like this about myself.
I’m punctual. I hate being late because I am really impatient.
I like how my body is changing. I lost 90+ pounds in 2017
I like that I am a good mother. For reals.
I’m a good wife, too. I don’t feel obligated to be either. I want to be. I’d call this a huge improvement over my last marriage.

Dislike:

I can be really impatient sometimes but never with my patients, oddly enough.
I am a terrible, awful, no good, very bad housekeeper. I wish I was better at it.
I work too much and I work too hard.
I don’t connect well with people and come off as callous and cold pretty frequently.
I rarely give second chances. Burn me once, shame on you. Burn me twice, shame on me.

13. Three things I want right now. Sleep, a drink, and extra money.

14. Are you wearing a necklace, who got it for you, where’s it from? I am not.

15. How long was your last phone conversation? 15 minutes. My Bert, called. I miss him. We were discussing when the best time for him to come visit would be. I am excited about that, too.

16. What are you looking forward to? Reconnecting with old faves and finding new ones on here.

17. Did you get anything off your chest today? Not really.

18. How many rings do you usually wear? One.

19. Would you rather go to Canada or California on vacation? Canada. I’d like to go to Vancouver or Montreal because I haven’t been there yet.

20. Are you wearing jeans, shorts, sweatpants or pajama pants? None. Rocking the scrub pants at the moment. #nurselife

21. Do you call it fall or autumn? Fall.

22. Are you an emotional person? Depends entirely on the situation.

23. It’s 2 in the morning and you get a text message, who is it most likely from? My friend Jenn

24. Do you like long car rides? Yessssss, especially if I am the driver. I have to be in the front or I get sick.

29. Would you like the ability to read minds? Yesssss!

kraziekatt

hheeeyyyooo! Look it! I’m posting on your diary.

1 reply

@kraziekatt Woooo! Here’s to many more postings! <3

Drew 2.0

Thank you for your comment.

To answer your question, we’re simply best friends now. She’s a woman who likes straight men, I identify as gay. So it simply wouldn’t work. I’m not going to lie, I feel like a parent sometimes now but all in all, our friendship has endured. How could I just up and walk out of someone’s life when they were at their most vulnerable? I’ve thought about it….starting fresh and just closing this chapter, but until she’s settled and living with someone and in a good place, I feel some weird sense of responsibility to help see this transition to it’s completion.

Does any of that make sense?

2 replies

@drew20 It makes total sense and I like to think that I would feel the same way. I am still attached to my most recent ex even though I moved on, remarried, and it’s been three years. Something about him keeps me close but not too close. I want to know that he’s happy and I get the impression that you feel the same way.

It’s admirable. I can tell youre a great human. Can’t wait to get to know you better. <3

January 30, 2018

@thefabulousmp Thanks! Likewise. I am looking forward to learning more about you as well!

It’s interesting. You know, a lot of people….really good, solid, trustworthy, decent people….told me to just move on and close that chapter and in some ways, that might have been the more beneficial route, but having been raised by two of the most kind, caring, compassionate people I know, it”s just not in my DNA to “discard” someone, especially when they’re at the most vulnerable point in their life. I love Aubry….not in a romantic way of course, but almost as “family”. Right now, she’s all I’ve got. My family lives four states away and my closest friends are scattered across the country. I need her about as much as she relies on me.

Fearless Dreamer

That was fun. So, I will nab the survey from you 🙂 Thanks.

@timita It was fun for me, too. Nab away!

Almost Blue

I love that you pinched this 😀 I always thought surveys were a great way to open up and also start getting to know people 😀

Also: “What song I’m currently listening to. Nothing… does audible count?” Omg, yes audible counts so much! I am an absolutely rabid devourer of audiobooks. Any recommendations?