Aspire!

Hey, sorry I haven’t updated in so long, its just that I’ve been so busy with nothing, and more nothing, and for some reason the simple fact that I just haven’t cared to write, despite being painfully self evident, isn’t quite good enough…so instead, a few sloppy and wholly dishonest excuses.

So today my alarm clock went off. I pushed the snooze button twice. After that, I woke up, and took a shower. Well, I ran the water, then brushed my teeth and shaved. I did my lower rear teeth for about 20 seconds, then my upper rear teeth for another 20, then slowly moved the ol battery forward and covered all the angles. Tore off a piece of floss, did one tooth and said the hell with it today. Shaved. Showered.

Then I had pancakes. They were good. A good honest breakfast, for a good honest day. I smiled at the waitress and left her a nice tip, even though the service was terrible and I just wanted to kill her. She smiled at me too, and told me to have a nice day, even though she really could care less, and also wanted to kill me.

Then I went to work. I took things from over there, and moved them over here. Then I took some other things from over here, and moved them over there. Then I did something which justifies my existence, and makes a not-so-subtle case for my general victory over life…which I need you to believe, quite desperately.

After work I called Jane, who is the only woman in the world that exists, and we engaged in mediocre sex, though it was also the most earth-shattering bed-breaking experience in the universe. I told her things, then she told me things. She is just so important, you know? So special. There really are no other women in the world, and believe me I’ve looked (around)….(sort of).

Anyway, anyhow, so anyways, so anyhows, I don’t want to write anymore…which is to say I have somewhere to be, with some things to do. Ending just because I feel like it just doesn’t seem to flow………….I promise I’ll write more about my awesomeness later, PEACE OUT

Sincerely,

Gabe the baberino