Sociopathic Secrets to Success

When Jesus said do unto others, as you would have them do unto you, it wasn’t advice. It was a factual and universal statement regarding the way people treat one another…or at least you should assume so, if you want to avoid being unfairly treated like dirt. The advice requires a return on an investment; polite empathy in exchange for polite empathy…but most people do not attempt any degree of interest or curiosity regarding how the temporary stranger in front of them would prefer to be treated, and instead they just selfishly follow Jesus’ advice, treating everyone the way that they would like to be treated, not the way the person in front of them is treating them, the way that person wants to be treated. This can create problems if someone prefers brief and professional communication, while another prefers long winded sympathetic communication. The solution is to flat out STOP treating people the way you want to be treated, and simply treat them the way they treat you. It’s fair. It’s favorable to the person you’re interacting with. And most of the time if someone is being brief and condescending towards you, they really truly want you to be brief and equally aloof in return…

A few questions: 1) What if you’re interpreting the other person incorrectly? What if they don’t mean to be condescending, they just don’t have much to say or they don’t know WHAT to say? 2) Don’t you think your philosophy would lead to a lot of mutual hatred in the world? Human behavio(u)r is not stable. It changes on a day to day basis. The nicest person can be a jerk from time to time.

3) How does forgiveness or acceptance play a role into your philosophy?

1) No room for interpretation? I guess I don’t understand how your philosophy can be implemented appropriately. Don’t you think human intentions are difficult to interpret? 2) I still think it’s difficult to determine how someone wants to be treated on any given day. What if the person you are interacting with is conflicted in how they want you to treat them? 3) Good point. I can’t tell if you

are annoyed that I continue to read you or not. See? I can’t implement your philosophy with you. I’m not sure how you want to be treated.

Too much thought is put into either philosophy for my liking. I understand your method and I understand the Christian method, but I’m a firm believer of just being myself, regardless of how I want to be treated, regardless of how the other person wants to be treated. I keep a lot of things to myself if they are unnecessary for me to say, but I won’t hesitate telling a female friend when she asks

me if she has gained weight. However, having said that, I should probably add that it depends on the relationship that I have with the person. I probably have ONE female friend that I can say that to, and she won’t get upset with me. She would take it for what it is. The rest? I walk on eggshells. I guess my point is that, how I treat someone really depends on how they are going to react to it,

and whether their reaction is important or not to me. I won’t lie– I follow social standards appropriately. I am not rude, although I will not hesitate to ask a server at a restaurant if she’s just having a bad day or if she’s just being rude. In the end, if someone treats me like crap, they’re going to treat me like crap whether I want them to or if they want to be treated like crap in return.

I would rather do my best to not expect anything from people so that there’s no room for disappointment. Now, I COULD be a b*tch to everyone I know, because sometimes it’s just plain fun, but it doesn’t really do anything for me, and with the kind of conscience I have, I would probably regret it later unless the person REALLY deserved it.

And some days, I just have to plainly tell someone how I want to be treated. Sometimes, I’ll tell my best friend, “Hey, I need you to be nice today. I’m a little sensitive,” which is out of character for me, but does happen from time to time. Communication over interpretation– that’s how I prefer things.

I’ll respond later. I didn’t say what I wanted to say. I’m still at work and am being constantly interrupted.

Well, that’s about as right-on as it gets. I call it the “Platinum Rule”: Do unto others as they do to you.

Thats your opinion love.

lol Mine was like 95% Irish. I think someone noted in that entry about how WoW people are kind of a little TOO into “alternate realities”, and I’m thinking they might’ve been right… I dunno. So what happens when everyone’s sociopathic? 😉

I’m sorry I didn’t get back to you last night. I was quite burned out after work and was trying desperately to finish Mad Men. I’m only ten minutes away from finishing it, but couldn’t because of Megavideo constraints. Anyway, back to what we were discussing. And the ones who actually earn importance are the ones you deceive, skirt, and walk on egg shells for? No, you misunderstood

me. People I have to walk on eggshells for (ALL THE TIME, since, let’s face it, things happen and there is almost always a time that I will walk eggshells around a person during my relationship with them at one point or another) are people that I slowly lose respect for over time. I respect people for different reasons, but those who can’t handle truth and reality? The ones that want me to keep my

mouth shut when they continue to pine over a physically and emotionally abusive alcoholic? Eventually, I get to a point where I decrease my expectations to nothing, and their reactions only matter in the sense that I don’t respect them and their individual strength enough to be brutally honest with them. Instead, I’m quiet and wait for the good times to start rolling, because that’s all

those people (namely, women) are good for. I sound cold, but I have learned that there are people you can expect true friendship from and there are people you can’t expect it from. Once I realize I can’t be honest with someone, they go into this category where I continue to walk on eggshells, keep my thoughts to myself, and wait patiently for the sides of them I hang onto to come out in all the

false darkness. And a woman who asks you if she looks fat isn’t asking you if she looks fat…she’s asking you to tell her that she isn’t– which is easy to do when you reciprocate in the same vulnerable, and subtle fashion. I would agree with you when it comes to all but one of my friends. She and I share a bond because she’s in medical school and I want to be IN medical school. Anyway,

she knows not to ask me unless she has checked the scale and the scale does not reflect a weight gain, but when she looks in the mirror, she sees a weight gain. I’m brutally honest with her and I’ll tell her if I think she might have. Because I expect her to do the same. I’ll never ask. I would rather check the scale and take measurements of various spots on my body. I want to know based on fact,

not perception. I do think that how someone treats me says a lot about the person and THAT, in itself, is communicating something to me. I feel like we have gone off topic. And I need a new OD plus subscription.