Psychic powers, activate?
So apparently I’ve been getting my psychic on pretty heavily for the past week or so. It started with waking up from a dead sleep about to throw up. A minute or two of deep breathing calmed my stomach enough to get back to sleep. A day or two later, it happened again. Sunday night it happened and took a full 10 minutes of deep breathing to finally get back to sleep. Then I proceeded to have incredibly detailed dreams about being pregnant. I mean, I talked to Jo, I went and saw one of the local midwives and the OB she works with, plus my OB all to get an opinion on what the best thing to do about my IUD was. Woke up Monday morning briefly convinced I was pregnant. Test says otherwise. I start trying to figure out when I had my last period. I know it was when Wes got home from North Anna because I remember him being ready to enjoy his wife after 6 weeks away and I told him tough luck. I’m thinking that was the first week of April.
Come downstairs and read an entry from a good friend of mine that SHE is pregnant. I’m like, oh, ok. So maybe I’m just getting my psychic on for her. Although she doesn’t have an IUD so all the crazy details in my dream didn’t make any sense in the respect, but it’s all good. I’m assuming that subconciously I was aware of a pregnancy somewhere in my vicinity and so my brain just made it into me in the dream. Makes sense, I guess. I go through my various stages – super happy for her, pissed at my husband because it’s officially the longest I’ve been without being pregnant in almost 7 years, pissed at myself because what in the hell do I need with another baby right now?!, back to mostly just happy for her (until I see a super cute tiny baby somewhere and then I go through the other stages briefly again).
Moving on with life. Still haven’t gotten my period. While it’s not entirely out of the norm for me (consider before having Xander I only had one maybe 3 times a year), it IS out of the norm for the last 5 years or so. Since having Xander and getting my period back at 15 months, whenever I’ve actually had a period (which has been few and far between due to pregnancy and breastfeeding), it’s been surprisingly regular. I verify with Wes that he came back from North Anna April 6th. So definitely should’ve started by now.
This morning I am completely nauseaous. I don’t feel *sick*, just absolutely sick to my stomach. I even ate breakfast and it hasn’t gone away. Like, seriously? Now I’m apparently having some crazy kind of psychic sympathy pregnancy or something. Because I’m not having a hard enough time accepting being done for the time being – I REALLY need this on top of it. Stupid. And then I start googling ectopic pregnancy (because it’s common with IUDs) and whether or not that would come up with a positive test. Of course, the information is conflicting. Some places say that any implantation anywhere would cause the production of HCG which would lead to a positive test. Others say that the body doesn’t always recognize what’s going on in the tube as implantation and either doesn’t produce it or doesn’t produce enough of it to read positive.
I know for a fact it’s been at least 2 weeks since I had sex. If by some crazy chance the IUD failed, I should definitely be getting a positive by now. So it didn’t. My body is just psychically latching on to a friend’s pregnancy for dear life. I wish it would stop.