Annoyed.

Today, my mom and her 2 sisters that live here went out for a “sister day” to celebrate my aunt’s birthday. This time they invited my cousin, my sister, and I along. We went shopping, went to lunch, saw “No Strings Attached,” and had ice cream. It was so fun. Definitely weird hearing them talk about sex, and definitely awkward watching a PG-13 lesbian scene with them. But we had a good time. Laughed so much we all almost peed. ********** Garrett is my best friend here. Not my best friend. That’d be Kaiti. But my best friend who lives here. I love spending time with him, but not when he drinks. Which is all the time because he’s an alcoholic. He goes through phases where he only drinks beer, though, and I love that. He’s so much easier to be around then. Anyway, I often feel like he uses me. Because of his DUI he can’t drive. So every time we hang out, I pick him up and drive him home. Very rarely does he ever have gas money for me. And he doesn’t dare give up a night at the club to hang out with me. Usually he hangs out with me until 9 or 10 and then goes to the club. The only time he spends more time with me is when he’s broke. It’s pretty obvious that he only asks me to hang out when he can’t afford to go out or when his other friends are busy. That hurts my feelings. ********** Today he asked me to hang out. I told him I was busy with my family and he said to get with him when I was done. At about 6:30 we discussed me picking him up. The only directions to the friend’s house he was at was by taking a highway he knows I don’t like to take. So I told him he’d have to find other directions. He said maybe I could get him later at his house. This lazy bitch likes to pick people up on her way home instead of getting back out of the house to drive the 15 minutes. So at about 7:30 I asked him where he was. Still at his friend’s. He said he was gonna stay the night at his boyfriend’s tonight instead. Ok. So I went home. At 9:00 he asks me to pick him up from his house. I asked why he didn’t tell me earlier he wanted to come over. Apparently his ride home wasn’t ready to go yet, and I guess he decided not to stay at his boyfriend’s. ********** I just get so annoyed. Every time we hang out, he’ll tell me something like “Okay we need to leave in 20 minutes because so-and-so is meeting me to go to the club.” And I take him home. Even though he never says “Hey, I know you’re driving, so do you think we could leave in 20 minutes?” So why can’t he tell his other friends “Hey I need to leave so I can meet Sarah”? And the other night he was supposed to be at my house “before 9:00”. Didn’t show up until 10:30. I’m old. I don’t start hanging out at 10:30pm. He was texting me the whole time saying he was almost here. He told me later that when he was texting me, he wasn’t even on the way. So. Fucking. Annoyed. He spent an hour tonight trying to convince me to come get him. I kept saying no. I guarantee he only wanted to come over so bad because he left his beer here. And I’m so fucking codependent that I really really wanted someone to hang out with. But I’m so tired of feeling taken advantage of, and not feeling like he values our friendship. So I didn’t go pick him up. ********** And goodnight. And I love you, baby.