God damn funniest thin I ever wrote

Its like alzheimers, I write somethin, ferget bout it, then read it and laugh my ass off.  So im gonna fuckin write it again.  Funniest god damn thing Ive read that I wrote.

Man “I am very concerned about your peanut intake.” What an odd thing fer a doctor to say. I know Ive said this before but I so mean it this time, when I go to see the doctor I will not be lured in by a man in the parking lot drunkinly screamin “Hey I gots a medical book! WOOOOO! Goin to the doctors what they WANT you to do! Fuck the sytem Rawr! Attica Attica!” Then throwin rocks at a child leavin the office while screamin FUCKIN SCAB! Honestly, never again. This time I mean it. Unless its this guy again. He was thorough. Turn yer head, cough, bark like Snoodle Dave when i hit him with that brick fer lookin at my play doh.

I was like I think Im gettin ulcers and he kept screamin TAKE DOWN YER PANTS NOW! RAWR TAKE EM DOWN! And I hesitated and was like hmmm yer a doctor right, and he was like wellll have I shown you my medical book? So meh who am I to argue with science. But bonus though Dr. Willy told me I could buy a bottle of vodka and share it with him and Id be fine. He said that the pharmecutical companies dont want me to know about the healin powers of vodka cause theyll lose money. Actually he screamed “VODKA BUY ME IMMMMMMM A LESBIAN MAN! PULL DOWN YER PANTS!” But I assume he meant the pharmecutical conspiracy thing.

BUT! I persuaded Dr. Willy to actually move in. Yeaaaa so now I can bring out the sign that says “Doctor on premesis” and its legal this time not like the whole blah blah ohhhhh sexual predator incident. Actually I didnt so much persuade him as he just brought his stuff inside and medically proclaimed “Yer a faggot make me tacos while I fuckin move my stuff into yer stupid faggot hou…yer the mexican! Ill fuckin, Ill stab you! I have a spoon! Wheres my taco!?!…..DONT TOUCH MY SPOON YOU MEXICAN!!!” Then he broke the window with a shoe he had in his pocket and told me glass is bad fer me. Actually he just kinda said “I HATE GLASS!” But meh hes a doctor, he knows more than I do so yea fine away with the glass Dr. Willy. So I should really get back to breakin windows now.

See that shits funny.  I think I just really enjoy violence.  More random the better.  End transmission ya weiner.