You’re Beautiful

Someone asked me on msn today "how’s it going?" and I automatically and quite honestly typed back "it’s going great". I haven’t been able to write that for so long. But, things really are great. I mean, there’s still shit going on, I still cut every so often but…I’ve had some of the happiest times recently. And they have all been with Ollie. I hate people who go "omg, I’m so happy with my new guy etc" but technically he’s not a new guy, we’ve seen eachother on and off since i was 16 and…I dunno. It’s so good…no, such a relief to be with him finally. I’ve started to realise perhaps with Jason it wasn’t that I wanted to have ‘single fun’ perhaps it was just that who I was with wasn’t who I wanted to be with? Perhaps me and Jason weren’t really as happy as we made out. Or perhaps I wasn’t as happy as I made out? I don’t know. I don’t know.

I went shopping with Ollie and his mum today in Norwich. It was fun. I mean, I was a little worried because it’s my boyfs mum who also happens to be a teacher I don’t know very well from my school. but, I had a good day. I spent far too much. But, I got 3 new sets of underwear (when I got home : MUM:what did you get? ME:erm…underwear – MUM:more underwear?? ME: I like underwear!) I got a scarf, a necklace, some matching earrings, and this amazingly cool scarf mitten and bag set. They are khaki wool. I love them. I went to see Rachel Stevens at work in the new House of Fraser.

I have a test/timed essay tomorrow for pro- and anit-social behaviour tomorrow in psychology. I need to revise…after I finish my pot noodle dinner. I’m too buzzed to eat properly. *grins*

Love and hugs, Lauren xxx