ZPD 8.14

"Let me not pray to be sheltered from dangers, but to be fearless in facing them. Let me not beg for the stilling of my pain, but for the heart to conquer it. "

~ Rabindranath Tagore

Leading people through a crisis is the worst job on the planet.  A good leader shoulders the burdens and dangers of his group, accepts responsibility for making decisions, and keeps an alert and level head at all times.  He or she should always be thinking 3 steps ahead.  Analyze situations for dangers, and adapt to circumstance.  The stress is great, and constant.  You must fear not only for yourself, but for the ones falling in step with you.  You have to be brave, and you need to show your bravery not by ignoring the fears always present, but by using these fears as guidelines when it is prudent.  Perfection is impossible, as far as I can tell, but guiding people safely through dangers is a success in black and white.  

Since Pete’s episode, I had unofficially shouldered the burden of leadership.  I walked slowly toward Evelyn’s open door, my gun still slung harmlessly around my back.  I checked each of the windows, dark and empty.  Evelyn herself stood a step inside the doorway, blocking my view of the inside.  Guy and Pete walked in step behind me.  Everyone was tense, and thinking the same thing.  We could be walking right into a trap.  Evelyn had warned us of more gunmen.  There was no real way of knowing if she was telling the truth, until we walked through the front door.  I held up short at the first doorstep.

"Guy, Pete, wait here until I say it’s okay."

They both nodded.  Guy was still holding her shotgun in the one hand.  The muzzle was pointed down, but I could see her nervously playing with the safety.  She would have my back.  Pete also seemed more focused.  His breathing was low, and his eyes were jumping from place to place to spy an ambush.

"You coming in here ur what?" Evelyn asked impatiently.

"Yeah" I said, as I stepped through the doorway.  "We’re just a bit nervous about walking into a place with guns trained on us."

"That’s the point of it"

The entranceway was dark.  There was a ceiling lamp above her head, but it wasn’t lit.  A staircase rose up behind her, and the room opened up to the right.  The space was mostly empty.  There was a shoe rack, and a few hooks to hang coats and hats.  A door stood shut at the back of the room, and Evelyn herself stood in an another open doorway to my left.  I could see a table and chairs, and figured it for the dining room.  That meant there was probably a kitchen just beyond.  Good place to find knives in a pinch.

"So where are the other shooters?" I asked pointedly.

"There’s one right there" she said, pointing upward.

Standing above and to my right in the upstairs hallway was a girl around Guy’s age.  She had paler skin than her mother, and raven dark hair to her shoulders.  She also had a gun like mine, pointed at my head.

"Hi there", I said and waived.  She did not bother to reply.

"Evelyn, there’s no way my friends are coming inside with a gun pointed at our heads like that."

"Uhh, you don’t have a choice.  I don’t know who you kids are.  Step inside one at a time, and uhh, just line up on the wall there."

"They’re not going to walk into a trap.  We need you to trust us, before we trust you."

"Trust you?  You’re a strange one.  We haven’t seen a one all week that wasn’t trying to kill us."

"If we wanted to kill you, we could.  So far we haven’t, so cut us a break." Guy said as she walked through the door, her gun raised in Evelyn’s face.

"Guy! Gun down!" I shouted at her.

"What about them? I say they put their guns down first."

Evelyn was backing away from Guy into the dining room.  Guy pushed forward, holding her stance.  I heard the click of a safety, and turned to see the dark haired girl pull her gun tight to the shoulder.  My hand went instinctively to grip the handle of the revolver under my shirt.  Pete looked ready to rush through the door, but I held him off with my hardest look.

"This doesn’t end good Guy.  Lower the gun." I repeated.

She stood her ground for a second or two longer.  I was ready to dive for cover and draw, but if she hadn’t listened to me, I would almost certainly have been killed.  When she did lower her weapon, the dark haired one above me did the same.

"Smart move" she said above us.

Evelyn was not impressed.

"This one’s trouble." She said.  "It’s lucky for you ya listened to your boyfriend.  Penny was close to shooting."

"Penny?" I looked up at the girl above me.  She shook her head, and pointed back at the dining room.  Guy was giving daggers to Evelyn, but standing two steps behind Guy was a girl no older than 10 years old.  She had blonde hair like her mothers, and a gun like her sisters pointed right at Guys back.

"Guy.  You almost got shot by a toddler." I told her.

"I’m nine and a half!" Penny retorted.

Guys shoulders tensed as she turned around.  She gave me a guilty look, and put her hands up in the air.

"They don’t look crazy mom." Said the girl above me.

"This one does." Evelyn insisted.

"If I was crazy, I would have shot you."

"You looked ready enough"

"But she listened to the guy mom.  Those other ones would have shot us."

I was so grateful to that raven haired angel.

"Your daughter’s right Evelyn.  We haven’t met a freak yet that responded to conversation." I told her.

"They’re not freaks!" She cried.  "They’re just sick."

Things seemed to be calming down a little, so I called for Pete to step in and shut the door.  I decided to renew the introductions.

"I’m Gavin, this is Pete, and Guy is the crazy one with the shotgun." Guy really didn’t like that.

"Thank you for letting us into your home Evelyn.  Nice to meet you Penny, and…"

"Pearl"

"…and Pearl."  I finished with a smile for the girl upstairs.

Pete put his bat against the wall and sat on his knees.

"Nice to meet you Penny" he repeated.  She looked at him with wide eyes, not sure what to say, or whether she should smile or shoot.  Guy had almost the same look of surprise, and I’m sure mine was just as dumb.  It was good to hear him speak again.

"Can we offer you any food?  We have some fresh supplies in our packs.  You’re welcome to it."

"Well finally!  Some manners from you kids.  Break out what

ya got, and let’s get it in the kitchen."

Evelyn turned and waived us further inside.  Penny seemed to relax a bit, and put her gun down on the floor.  Pete shouldered the packs, and carried them inside.  Guy waited in the dining room, and I waited for Pearl to come down the stairs.  I took her hand as soon as it was in reach.

"Thank you." I said.  I meant it.

"Better than dyin." she said.

I tried to let go of her hand as we walked into the dining room, but she held on.  I didn’t mind at all.  Pearl wasn’t a heart stopping beauty, but her eyes sparkled, and her smile was quick and natural.  I liked her immediately.