Plural.

Noah freaked me the fuck out last night. I got up to feed Baby sometime in the middle of the night, and he got up too, to keep me company. And while I was feeding her, he said something like "I love seeing you with her. I can’t wait to have more babies with you."

What. The. Fuck. The idea of another baby isn’t even a tiny bit in my mind, let alone babies. Plural. Eek.

I told him I think we should wait and make sure we’re in any way capable of raising one sane, functional human before I just start popping them out left and right. And he said he didn’t mean right this second, of course, but that he can see us having "a few more kids." Again, what the fuck?? Our ONE baby was unplanned, so I’m not sure exactly how he switched over to picturing us intentionally having a whole big brood of them.

I’m kind of freaked out.

I hope this isn’t going to be a big source of conflict. There’s no way I’m going to have "a few more kids." I hadn’t even entertained the idea of having ONE more kid, though I might be open to at least talking about it in a couple years, when I haven’t JUST had a baby, and if Noah and I are doing well. But not "a few more." Definitely.

I don’t even remember what all I said (it was like 3 in the morning) but I’m pretty sure he got the message that he’d freaked me out. He said we definitely don’t need to talk about it right now and he wasn’t really meaning to bring up the topic, he was just happy seeing me holding Baby and it came out without thinking.