Problems upon problems…. Upon Problems…

well what the hell.. *sighZ* j and me are having relationship problems. My female cycle is all fucked up… and Money /job probelms… I soley believe im the screw up in this realtionship. and yet he feels like its all his fault. lately our sexdrives haven’t been in since and in the  past they were.

God i dont knwo what to do… it so seems like were heading towards splitsville and u all know i dont want to be there… im so upset i did something unsual for me i did the dishes… I hate housework… and i did dishes!?!?!!? Oiiiiii  I am at a loss…. i wish we could win the lottery but that takes money we dont have. and what if it isn’t stress playing havoc on me? what if im pregant? OOIII Not the P word please… When having sex we have used condoms… but jeezus dont let me be in the failure percentage… oh please!! I am too damn emotional and stressed right now to handle a baby made in love… God i love him to death. but this being my first relationship… and i so want to marry j…. GOd…  help… ME…..