Sadness adn confusion… edit:

Today i learned one of my best onlien chat friends passed on from diabetes.(sp) TO a man who just got married and had a child all within the last few years and he brought such joy and happiness and saved my own neck from my self a time or two in the 2 years that i have known of him.  I will miss him.. even tho we talked rarely and he always made ya laugh so hard you could cry. That could be said of several men that i have met that have died.

On Another note my body is really creepin me out when i get up later today im calling my physician. and seeing if he will see me like asap. cus this is completly freaking me out. I did some research on webmd.com to try n figure out what is possibly bothering me. several things have similar syptoms to what im going through.

these are such things like: every women’s nitemare endormetirous (sp) it basically renders a female unable to have kids; a miscarraigel; cancer of the ovaries; pre menopausal symptoms im at the right age it occurs mainly between the ages in 20-35 for women. I dont know it all scars me because i want to be able to have my bf’s children someday and this is really freaking me out more so than not having a job. *sighZ*

Here ends my rambling for the day.

will have some idea got a drs. apointment for 4 pm today!