fading

Venice wakes and keeps his eyes closed
his body still
he senses a presence in close proximity to his body
some part of his brain that feels at first alien informs him he is on a boat
he listens
the sounds of a marina, land
the air tastes like land
sunlight and dust
docked
– who’s here, Sunderland?
he hears someone start
– don’t for one minute think he’s asleep. even if he is
the person settles down on the other side of the cabin, close to where Sunderland’s voice comes from
– doctor
Venice opens his eyes
slowly sits upright
turns to Sunderland
– you don’t eat, don’t sleep, and when you do tears come out of your lids
Venice stares
– looked at yourself lately?
he turns towards the doctor
– you’re recently malnourished, but i’d reckon you weren’t eating much regularly for a good long while anyway
Venice turns back to Sunderland
he gets up, leaves the cabin, brings back three cups of coffee
– no thanks
the doctor says
he thinks for a moment
– i can’t give him anything – at least get him to drink water, what with all this coffee you’re drinking
he turns back to Venice
– you will drink water won’t you?
no reply
the doctor turns again to Sunderland
– he needs to put on weight, but he won’t if he doesn’t want to
turns again to Venice and looks him in the eyes
Venice stares back
– whatever it is, it lives and dies inside your head
they stare

the doctor nods
gets up and exits the cabin
Sunderland follows him out into the sun
when he returns and sits down, Venice stares at him
– do you want to die?
his voice is open, honest and without apprehension or negativity of any kind
Venice doesn’t respond
– just understand that i’ll keep pulling into port whenever i think you’re unwell
the gentle rock of the boat on calm swells
Venice inclines his head, lifts it again in a single slow nod
– thank you
stares out at the endless blue of sea and sky