rituals

5am
Auckland and Cairo slouch beside each-other on the wide sofa
beneath a doona and watching Media
the way they did so many years ago in the business before a Task
mindless Media
with the sound off
her head is in the contour of his shoulder and neck
Auckland doesn’t know if this is what love feels like
because there’s too much fear clouding his emotions
they’re close friends
he feels their closeness
but he denies himself the luxury of infatuation
Auckland is tired, but he knows Cairo will be wide awake
when things are like this, she doesn’t sleep

– we’re going to have to leave at some point, he says
– yeah
Cairo sounds tired, but he knows her better than that
– do you think we should try to find Venice? she adds
Auckland stares at the silent images on the screen
the apartment flickers with the ever-changing blue glow of the Media wall
he’s reduced the image to the size of an old historic television
– no
Auckland says
– wherever he was, he’s already gone
Cairo doesn’t know why this makes her feel more alone
she puts her arms around Auckland and holds him tight
– do you think we’ll ever see him again
Auckland wants to say no
because as much as he misses his best friend, coming together would only mean bad things
and he really wished those bad things weren’t happening
– i don’t know
he replies, almost a whisper
– i don’t know