Upset
Okay,
Well ever since that BK incident, I’ve been thinking about that long, horrid year in Iraq. And thinking about it brings back unfond memories, and most especially unfond feelings.
Mostly feelings of anger at my girl for abandoning me. We were so close before I deployed. Like this [—]. Then as the months went on in Iraq,… she grew more distant and distant. Then come my halfway point (7 months in, 7 months to go) I get an email from her saying she doesn’t want to see me on my Leave (which was 2 weeks away). So we argue back and forth through email and she decides she doesn’t ever want to hear from me again and she doesn’t know how she could EVER have liked someone as horrid as me. That still hurts my feelings to remember, btw.
Well now that I’m back… I’ve been thinking. She tossed me like a piece of trash when I needed her most. Why should I even try to be with her? She might do it again. I feel like the quote on the movie Hitch “You jumped off a cliff, thinking you could fly, and all the while you’re falling thinking ‘Why the hell did I jump?'”
Today I feel angry at her for things that happened 8 months ago or so. If she calls me on the phone I don’t know if I can hide it. I don’t want to treat her badly for something that long ago. Forgive and Forget. But she knows me well enough to know if I’m feeling angry.
So let’s just hope she doesn’t call today. I feel used. And angry.
It’s an amazing chain reaction that started by some punk kid thinking it would be funny to make a soldier flinch in public with a boom.
thats really messed up-on of my friends is over there right now and i will never forget him!! i send him cookies and gummi bears every week-its messed up that she would leave you when you need a tie to home-you prolly better off w.out her!!
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I don’t really agree with what she did. Maybe she had her reasons, who knows, but if you’re together with a solider then you have to know what you’re getting yourself into… seems like she wasn’t really as prepared as she thought. Try and let yourself not get too wound up about it, it’s not worth it hun.
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I almost hope she does call. It seems like this is something you two still need to work through. There’s forgiving, yes, but in forgiving you don’t have to – and probably aren’t supposed to – put yourself back in the same situation for it to happen again. Not without good reason. Has she given you good reason to trust her again?
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I do think it was wrong of her to split like that but like someone else said…maybe she wasnt prepared. My ex was a soldier (was with him almost a year and most of that time he was in Kuwait) and it can be tough but if she couldnt make it through that with you then its understandable why you would ask yourself if she would do this kind of thing to you again. Though, 8 months is a long time later
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to be showing anger toward her about it. Do you really forgive her? Either way, you havent let it go so if you’re going to stay with her there is a lot of communication that needs to go on. Trust needs to be rebuilt. Whatever way it goes, I wish you the best. *hugs*
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I’ve thought a lot of a situation like that for a relationship before, and do you know what my conclusion was? A relationship takes trust, and not only trust to remain faithful, but trust that they’re going to be there; that they’re going to hold up your heart when you can’t do it alone; that they are there better or worse. A relationship is crap without it The only question is can you trust her
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still?
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