church

things are hard here, I went to church today without him, never with him, I cried the whole time. if only people knew what was going on…. church is always do weird for me, I don’t sing, I just observe, I believe it but I don’t feel it.

everyone tells me how strong I am. want to know a secret? I don’t feel strong. I feel alone and scared…..

tomorrow will be another day, a hard day, a long day. 4 or more hits spent driving tomorrow, two of them alone with no one but myself to talk to..