Lower & helpful boys

 The mood continues to spiral into the reclusive space. It isn’t sadness or depression, it is different.

I talked to my psych teacher and my dad and both of them recognized it as one of the final shifts before labor. 

He dropped. He is so low now I can’t bend over, and I am having trouble sitting. it is such a lovely feeling you convinetly forget about when you are no longer pregnant.

It is amazing how much effort it is to walk these days. Walking brings on contractions. But I walk and walk and walk. Not to start labor so much but to stay moving. Moving is the best right?

Tomorrow is my last ultrasoiund. I am anxious about it. I worry about his mouth formation. I worry about his postion as well. The doctor wants to see how big he is. WIth my luck they will tell me he is 10 pounds already. If so I will just smile and agree, knowing there is a margin of error of 2 pounds on either side. No size of baby scares me.

I got an email stating that class tonight is a guest lecturer, I will show up and find out if it is vital for me to be in attenance. If not I might just leave. I am nauseated more than normal, and so uncomfortable. 

Between contrations, nausea, and my legs being so restless, I am feeling not the best. I don’t think I have smiled in a few days. 

I know I am scowling and I can’t seem to help it. 

Can I just take a moment to tell you how sweet my son is. 

I was out trying to get dug out from the snow yesterday, and I walked around the van to find him out there with a shovel pushing the snow. 

He came out to help me which was endearing. 

What was not endearing? 

He had no coat, or shoes. and was covered in fresh snow. 

I rushed him in, and warmed him up… It was sweet in a way for him to want to help. Not so great he escaped with no shoes. 

I have detirmeined I need a fence for this child. This spring and summer if he can go to the backyard and just play without me worrying he will escape every 3 seconds if I look away it would make the season more fun for all of us.

Ughh… class calls my name. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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