then, now, and the future

Well I finally finished the last book, Eclipse, and it is a perfect end to the story. I wish the story never had to end. I can associate so well with the relationship between Edward and Bella save the vampire aspect. I still don’t think I could think of a better love story.

I miss Rob something awful and he is worrying me again. He sent me a text last night and said "good morning" and then I asked him how he was and then he said "ok i guess" and then nothing. I know to most people that looks like nothing, but to me…. its a lot, a warning. He usually tries so hard to make sure that he is always fine around me because he doesn’t want to worry me, and yes I want him to tell me the truth of how he is feeling, but when I asked him about it he said nothing and I asked him about it again today and he didn’t say anything about it. I know that I am just worrying too much, but heh that is how I am.

I got to hang out with my friend Chris O. from the Army before he went back to North Carolina. He played his guitar for me…. it was nice, and he is really good. I have so much fun when we hang out and he is aways trying to make me smile. I found out that he liked me back in high school and that he thought that I was out of his league and that I wouldn’t give him the time of day. It makes me think back to high school… how I thought that no one liked me and how alone I felt… and now I find all these people who liked me and its just odd to me. But its nice to have Chris O. in my life now, he understands me and he makes me laugh and its nice to have someone to talk to… who knows what living this lifestyle is like and how it feels. We have promised to keep in touch and he said that he wants to help keep me as happy as possible while Rob is away. Yesterday he said that he is worried about Rob and I because he doesn’t want anyone to start saying lies about him and I because he and I are talking a lot while Rob is away. I told him not to worry about it and I wouldn’t do that to Rob, but it was sweet that he was thinking about me.

I can’t believe that its the 13th already. My birthday is in 9 days and I don’t even care. I am turning 23 and it does not phase me in the least. I want September to get here so I can get back to school. The summer is killing me and so is my job…. getting up this early and having 9 hours of my day used up keeps me from doing a lot of the things that I want to. I haven’t been working out like I wanted because I work so much and have been so tired. I am hoping that I get to register for classes this week so I can make a schedule for myself. This summer has gone by so quickly and so slowly at the same time. Every week flies by while I work, but then the weekends come and even though I can attempt to catch up on sleep, I still find my mind swirling with what ifs, could bes, and all those things that I shouldn’t let myself think of.

Ugh… about 2 weeks left of this horrible summer that seems to never end. That also means almost a whole new month down. Then 5 months down and 6 more til I get to see him…. and we are only 2 weeks away from that.

Summer book list

1. Chicken Soup for the Military Wife’s Soul… 307 pages

2. Twilight (book 1) by Stephenie Meyer… 498 pages

3. New Moon (book 2) by Stephenie Meyer… 567 pages

4. Eclipse (book 3) by Stephenie Meyer… 629 pages

5. Echohawk by Lynda Durrant… 12 pages in

6. True Magick: A beginner’s guide by Amber K… 4 pages in