*sigh*

Another day and more tears. I went to class today… and now I am trying to do some school work and take some notes. It is so hard to just sit there…. I can feel my heart in agony just sitting there. I can’t sit for very long before I have to get up and do something. I keep trying to eat, but even the smell of food makes me sick. Everywhere I look there are people who are engaged or married and talking about their husbands and I just want to scream.

It sucks…

I still have to write an entry explaining why I am sticking by Chris and why I don’t and can’t just cut him out of my life. But I know that there will be a lot of tears for that so I keep putting it off. Just know that even though it will be harder, it will be better for me to be around him. It forces me to grasp the full nature of this. Does it hurt? Of course it does but no matter where I go or what I do it is going to hurt so I would rather take what I can get.

Log in to write a note
August 31, 2006

Hey! Snap out of it! It hurts to be heartbroken, but you do have to take care of your academics and health! We’re not afforded the luxury of pining away without other parts of our life suffering. Start small. Sit down with a light snack, and take the time to enjoy it, to understand it. Simple joys lead to live-changing revelations. Please take care of your self, all aspect of You! 🙂

August 31, 2006

everything will get better, you’re strong enough to face this on your own, don’t loose faith in yourself hugs me.

August 31, 2006

you know you dont have to do anything except breath eat and poop. Dont worry about the husband thing, i know that most marrages that happen before 25 also end up in devorse before they turn 25. except in my case i wasn’t married. engaged, but not married. Take care of yourself, and try to eat rice cakes, thats what i did.

you need to cut him out of your life. I dont agree with shazar when she says snap out of it bc its not that easy, and obviouslly has never been in your place. but you need to try your hardest to get away from him and have nothing to do with him…or as little as possible if needed. Its really better for you, and no one can help you. YOU have to help yourself and getting rid of chris is step one!

September 1, 2006

*hugs* :(:( <33333333333 charli .x.