“Before you say babies are expensive”
(stolen from gypsyincarnate)
WHAT YOU DON’T NEED:
A crib with lots of fluffy bedding.
If you’re cosleeping, a crib is going to be the biggest waste of $200 you’ll ever spend. Even if you plan on using it as a sidecar against your bed, your baby will still figure out how to wiggle its way into the bed with you. And yes, I know that ruffly crib set is just ADORABLE, but your baby doesn’t need it. Just put baby in bed with you, dressed in a sleep sack to keep warm.
A bassinette.
Your baby will outgrow this by the time he tops 15 pounds. Seriously. It’s a waste of money.
A changing table.
Do you really need another piece of furniture taking up space just to change your baby on? The bed or the floor will do just fine. The drawers might come in handy for storage, but the top will probably wind up as just another place to collect miscellaneous junk. Might as well just buy a dresser, in that case.
A travel system.
Ugh, how I loathe these. Yes, you definitely need a carseat, but you don’t need a stroller the size of an SUV. Those things are bulky, hard to manuever, and rob your baby of important body contact with you. Worry about getting a stroller when your baby is bigger, but before she outgrows that infant car seat, a sling will do just fine.
A Diaper Genie.
It’s a glorified trash can, plain and simple. And you have to buy special inserts for it. Yay. Just use a regular trash can with a pop lid and a trash bag inside. (This works great for cloth diapers too!) Smell shouldn’t become a problem if diapers aren’t allowed to ferment for too long, but if it does, just keep the can in the bathroom with the door shut.
A baby bathtub.
Here’s another thing your baby will outgrow in a matter of weeks. Now, the little leany thing might come in handy, but you could also use a regular bath pillow. Just lay baby on either of those in the big bathtub and fill it with enough water to wash.
Baby towels.
There’s nothing cuter than a newborn wrapped up in a hooded towel with a duck face on it. But as soon as your baby gets past newborn stage, that towel isn’t going to wrap around him quite so well. Really, I don’t know why they make these things so small. A regular towel will work just fine…and so will regular washcloths. You don’t need to buy special smaller ones just for your baby.
Baby shoes.
I know it’s hard to resist buying a pair of sneakers that you can barely fit your thumb into. But honestly, if your baby can’t walk, then he doesn’t need shoes. Socks or booties, yes. Full-fledged miniature Nikes, no. It’s a waste of money.
A wipe warmer.
You can warm up wipes just fine by scrunching them in your fist for a few seconds before applying them to baby’s skin.
Bouncy Seats, Exersaucers, and other Entertainment Gadgets.
It’s a good idea to have at least one kind of containment device, for those times when you’re deathly ill and have to put baby down to run to the bathroom and you don’t want him unfolding all the laundry that you just spent half a hour stacking on the coffee table. But you don’t really need ALL of them. Your baby will have just as much fun sitting on the floor playing with a handful of measuring cups as he will standing in a rotating playground that assaults him with blinking lights and beeping noises from all sides. However, all of our containment devices wound up being used by the cats as beds more than they were used by our son, so if you have cats, they might be put to good use after all.
A thermometer.
You can check your baby’s temperature just fine with the back of your hand or with your cheek. Feel hot? Then he is. Medicate accordingly.
NOW, HERE ARE THE THINGS THAT YOU DO NEED:
A sling!
You don’t have to be another one of those parents lugging along a heavy carseat with baby inside. Just lay the sling inside the carseat, strap baby in on top of it, and when you get to your destination, unbuckle the straps and lift the sling out with baby inside. This way, if she’s sleeping, you won’t have to wake her. Reverse the process when you get back into the car. You’ll save trunk room with no stroller to haul along, and your bab
y gets to spend important time bonding with you. Plus, it’s so much easier to navigate in small stores, on public transit, on a walk downtown or through the woods without a stroller.
A stroller!
Wait! Didn’t I just say that you didn’t need a stroller? Well, yes, I did. For the first few months of your baby’s life, at least. But once your baby approaches toddlerdom, if you’re small-framed and out of shape like me, that sling is going to feel mighty heavy on your back. Babywearing is important, but eventually you will probably need a stroller. A lightweight umbrella-type model is easy to carry and doesn’t take up much room. Pack the sling in your diaper bag just in case, and if baby decides he wants to be worn instead, you can use the stroller as a shopping cart.
A rocking chair!
Rock your baby as much as you can. You’ll treasure it, trust me. Especially when that baby becomes a toddler and won’t sit still for two seconds. And even when she gets to that age, she’ll still like being rocked by Mom from time to time. They’re great for breastfeeding too.
A swing!
Okay, you don’t really NEED one. But if you get only one containment device, make it a swing. You may love rocking your baby to sleep, but there are times when she’s going to want to keep rocking and you’re going to want to go to sleep too, or at least go to the bathroom. They are also terrific for soothing fussy babies. Be sure to buy lots of batteries!
A carseat!
Yeah, you do HAVE to have one. It’s the law. I recommend a convertible kind, so you’re not throwing down another wad of cash when your baby passes the 20-lb. mark for an infant seat.
A Boppy!
This thing is so freakin’ versatile. Use it for nursing, for propping baby up on the floor, for tummy time, for just about anything. Lay it across the arms of your computer chair, place baby on it, and voila! You can NAK (nurse at keyboard) with your hands free! WOOHOO!
A quality breast pump!
Those manual ones they give you at the hospital are crap. This may be the most expensive baby item you buy, but they’re worth every penny. Make the investment.
A quality nursing bra!
Skip the frumpy deals at Penney’s or Wal-Mart, they will just make you feel ugly and possibly even resent nursing because you can’t wear them under anything dainty. This is the Japanese Weekend "Hug" nursing bra, the best that I have tried – and believe me, I’ve tried lots. It doesn’t even look like a nursing bra, which means you can keep wearing it even after nursing is over. Unfortunately the company doesn’t seem to cater to full-figured mamas: the biggest size I found online was a 44D. I hear Bravado makes great bras in bigger sizes, though.
Cloth nursing pads!
Disposable nursing pads suck. They’re crinkly and sweaty and gross. Get a few dozen pairs of cloth ones instead. You can wash them with your regular clothes, and pass them along to a friend or relative when you’re done breastfeeding, too.
Recieving blankets!
This is one of those items that people often think is unnecessary, yet in fact they have MANY more uses than just as a blanket. In fact, I think I hardly even used mine as blankets at all. They make terrific burp cloths: those little bitty ones you will get as shower gifts don’t hold much. They are also good as travel changing pads to tuck into your diaper bag for when the changing table in the public restroom looks less than savory…or even worse, when there’s no changing table at all. And if you use cloth diapers, they make great diaper doublers.
A fan! (or any other object that makes white noise)
When your baby is in the womb, he hears a constant stream of noise: your inner organs working, your voice, all the sounds around you. After he’s born, he might find it a bit disconcerting to be in complete silence. A fan will help him fall asleep if he’s cranky. If you have a white noise machine, that works well too. Or try recording yourself vaccuuming on a blank cassette tape and playing it over and over.
A FEW THINGS YOU MIGHT NOT NEED BUT THAT COULD COME IN HANDY:
A baby monitor.
Unless you plan on spending large amounts of time on a different floor than your baby, you probably won’t need one of these. But it might be useful on the occasions that you want to take a shower while baby is sleeping, or catch up on some yardwork during his nap.
A Pack-N-Play.
The
se are good for Grandma’s house if baby has nowhere else to nap, or if Grandma’s house isn’t quite as babyproofed as your own. They fold up out of the way once baby goes home, which is handy. But you don’t really need one for your own house. Don’t cage up your baby. Put away your valuables, make your home safe, and let baby explore…under your close supervision, of course.
AND JUST FOR FUN, A FEW THINGS THAT I FIND DOWNRIGHT SCARY:
A crib tent.
Unless you live in Africa and you’re likely to die of malaria if you get a mosquito bite, there’s absolutely no need for this. If your kid can climb out of the crib, then maybe it’s time to put him in a big bed. Or at least gate off the bedroom so he can’t get far.
A play yard.
Aren’t these for putting puppies in, not children? If you need to keep your kids in a cage for their safety, then maybe you should babyproof your house a little better…or at least watch them more carefully. I find it even more disturbing when I see these outside. I can’t imagine kids having much fun out on the lawn when they’re confined to a space smaller than Mom and Dad’s bed.
A bath thermometer.
Do you seriously need to spend $20 on a gadget that tells you how hot your kid’s bathwater is? Here, try this: stick your hand in the water. Is it too hot? Okay, there you go.
AAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
I feel so sorry for this kid. Why did his parents take him to the beach if they were gonna stick him in a tent instead?
*EDIT* Cuz I can’t freakin’ believe this:
A baby cry analyzer. You’ve got to be kidding me. I guess there’s no need to actually pay attention to how Junior communicates anymore: just let him scream for 20 seconds so this machine can process it and tell you what he wants! Only $160!