This is the end of me and you…

What the fuck ever!!
So yeah I am single again. Well what happened was the last couple of days I just “wasn‘t myself” in John‘s eyes. Maybe I wasn‘t. I was dealing with the stupid shit about my father and just dealing with myself. I told him that if it had anything to do with him he‘d have known. Oh no, he pushes and pushes. He started to sound like my mother and I told him that he didn‘t have to do that seeing that I already have parents. So yeah. Then he just keep pushing me to say “leave me along and don‘t come looking for me.” He kept asking what it meant. I was at work and I couldn‘t drop and answer him. So he thought I meant it was over. I just didn‘t want to talk to him right hen and there. I didn‘t feel I had to explain myself seeing what I said was SELF EXPLANATORY!! So yeah. I was going to talk to him the following day, but when I signed online, he shown me his true colors. To his defense he felt he could damage me by throwing my past with Pete and Gordon in my face. What the fuck kind of shit is that?! You proclaim to love me and you do that. That‘s not love. That‘s just plain BULLSHIT!! So yeah we fought. It ended with me leaving and telling exactly what he did. He ended it. He asked me if I was in pain, and to tell you the truth, I don‘t feel any pain. I am not letting it bother me like it did last time. I am just going to go on with my life. If the future holds me to be with him, then it will happen, other than that, that‘s all I am doing and my reaction to the whole stupid situation.

Talked to Sean Tuesday. He had to come in and train Kara. I told him that I almost stole his number from under the counter and he was like “I told you you could.” I smiled. Then I told him that I wanted him to call me first. And that he knows where my number is so I expected him to use it. He laughed and I laughed. He said alright, and I told him that if he got bored to call me. No word from him yet. I see him tomorrow!!

I have to go to the dentist on my birthday. The right side of my mouth hurts. If I bit down hard it sends a pain through my jaw. It hurts to eat on that side so they have my coming in on my birthday at 2.

Hmm, I think that is it for this entry. I gotta go and shower and stuff so I can go get my check and then pick mom up at 12 at work. He trucks broken so I have become the taxi. Oye. No biggie mom took me out to lunch!!

PLCG!!

-A*

 

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hugs you deerve better than him..x

September 16, 2005

your right she does i was an ass thats all i can say