Y’al won’t believe this…

because I sure as hell don’t.

It is Mom’s heart. She will have an angiogram, angioplasty, or something like that tomorrow. Okay that would be today. I guess 4:30 in the morning is tomorrow. Anyway, I slept for a while, but woke up because of night terrors of Mom. I have such a fear of losing here on the operating table. I’m sure its normal to be scared and I am sure that I am just taking it to an extreme.

I don’t know what time she will be taken in so I plan on sitting up there with her all day tomorrow. Joseph is off, but I think I will call the in-laws and see if they want to spend time with her. That way I can take Jesse to see Mom before she goes in and Joseph can see her too. I will not take Doll to the hospital. Mom wants to see her badly, but the woman next to Mom has pneumonia and I just cannot take that chance with her.

Doll is so busy now. She rolls where she wants to go. Crawling in coming very soon. She will move about two scoots and then fall forward so I think not much longer and she will be off and running. She has to be watched constantly. The dogs like to keep her corralled on her blanket and steal her cookies. I give her those biter biscuits to gnaw on instead of my fingers. The dogs are just speed bumps to her though. If one is on the blanket next to her, she will scoot over to him and go over. She is growing up too fast.

The new job I’m looking into is at the hospital right down the street. I would be an operator and I guess you would say a greeter. I would sit in a booth and direct calls and help the families. I can’t wait. She said I would know in about two weeks. I want the job. The insurance is wonderful. I won’t have to worry about if I should get pregnant again. I won’t have to apply for Medicaid again. Doll will still be taken care of. There are lots of benefits at the hospital too, not just insurance. Oh, and the biggest thing of all, it will be mainly Monday through Friday. Maybe one weekend a month. I’m a little bothered that it will be full time and I will have even less time with Doll, but I want to move out in March and the money won’t hurt one bit.

Kay, y’all. How was that for a real entry? I won’t be around today as I told y’all before, but know that I will be back soon. I’ve got to shower and head to the hospital now.

Beth, I left you a message last night. Sorry I was crying so hard you might not understand what I was saying. I’ll call you again tonight probably. I hate to dump everything on you, but I love to have someone to listen to me whine.

Thank y’all for the sweet notes. Its nice to know that y’all care. Reverend, say a prayer today, if you don’t mind. It will be a comfort. Thank you.

Y’all take care and hug those babies tight.

Mandy