why?

Why?

Because Cumiden is the strongest blood thinner there is. Because four heart attacks in one year is too hard on the body. Because it was her time? I’m sure that’s what will be said. I still want to know why people have to go.

She wasn’t my grandmother and by no means would I ever let her be, but she did make bobby happy. And it was never fair for us to try to push her out of his life. I think we had come to accept her as part of his life a couple of years ago and now she is gone.

It hurts.

She was my first babysitter. You must think that is a strange way to be connected, but it was enough. After my grandmother passed, she did a nice job of entertaining bobby. We hated him for it for a long time. We hated her too. Later, it was just okay. Its not fair to expect someone to remain alone just because we are selfish and didn’t want our grandmother to be really gone.

Yesterday the woman that was my first babysitter and some comfort for my grieving grandfather had a stroke and an aneurysm. Her blood thinner to prevent another heart attack also prevented the doctors from stopping the bleeding in her brain.

I wish I were numb.

Hug those babies tight,

Mandy