Losing it.

♥ I’m totally losing it. I completely broke down last night when I got into bed. Less than a week ago, things were fantastic. I felt like I was finally on top of the world, everything was going so well, and then suddenly, I’m at the bottom of a pit.

And maybe most of it is in my head, but it doesn’t matter. It’s still the way I feel.

I’ve been scouring for jobs everywhere because I’m so broke. It seems like this is what I’m destined to do forever- search for jobs. Searching for jobs is like a full time job for me and it’s so discouraging. Why can’t I get a job that will last for more than 2 years at a time?? Why can’t I ever seem to get ahead of my bills? Why does it always seem like the only option is go work at a fast food place?

Why won’t he just contact me already?!? FUCK.

…
…
holy shit. 
Sitting here crying over this entry and HE TEXTS ME. Like seriously, this very moment.

 "Meggie Meggie, Meggie
can’t you see/
somehow your looks just hypnotize
me/ and I just love your sexy ways/
I can look at your pic all damn day"

.. and I literally just downloaded that song the other day, too. Creepy.

 but I’m still in the pit.