God I need a miracle…or an angel…something…

generated by sloganizer.net

Noters Beware!! This is a “mean-note” free diary.

I have gotten myself in quite a pickle this time. A bad one. See, a few years ago, I inherited some money from my grandpa after he died. Most of it went to pay off my student loans that were burying me. But I still had some left over. And I promised my parents I would put it away for later use. But I made the stupidest mistake ever and loaned it away to some friends of mine (who are now ex-friends, obviously)because they were in need of a new place to live and they have 4 kids. The deal was that they were supposed to pay most of the loan back with their income tax returns and then set up a payment plan for the rest of the balance. This was almost 5 years ago. Income tax time came and went and when I asked for my money back I got a story about how the husband owed back child support and they took his tax return. I have been battling to get my money back all this time. Once in a while I will get a few bucks back, but I was stupid and loaned out A LOT of money to them, so a few bucks is just a drop in the bucket. I cannot take them to small claims court because the amount I loaned them is over what you can get back in small claims court…that and the husband is now not working so they don’t have any extra money anyway.

But see, here’s the hard part. My mom and dad have offered to help me get a better car, but they want me to use some of the money that they think I have saved up. And to make matters worse, I screwed myself by helping these people. I have been the one struggling. I have barely been getting by. Last fall I got pulled over by the police and was busted for not having insurance. I wasn’t able to pay the tickets and get insurance in time to go to court…and I was scared so I didn’t go. This meant I had a bench warrant out for me. Well, last week I managed to get pulled over again, all because my light bulb was out on my license plate, and I wound up spending a night in jail. I still didn’t have insurance AND my license is suspended. My car got impounded which cost me 300 to get out and I also had to have insurance on it to have it released. My landlady (and true best friend) was able to get one of those payday loans to help me out with that…but now I have to pay that back starting next week. I owe $600 on my old tickets and then I can get my license reinstated, which will cost another $125. I don’t have a clue how to come up with this kind of cash. My parents keep asking if I am looking at cars, and I keep having to make excuses as to why I am too busy to do so….If they knew the truth, they would not speak to me ever again. My dad is VERY good with his money and looks down on people who are irresponsible with theirs. Telling them the truth is not an option. I am so sick over this….why, why, why was I so stupid?? I wish I knew someone who could help me out. All of this because I was nice and helped someone when they needed it…but now there’s no one to help me when I need it…

Violet

November 9, 2012

random noter: Come clean with your parents. You will feel better, and no parent worth having is going to stop speaking to you forever because you made a mistake. Tell him you’re sorry and that you’ve learned a lesson. My guess is that he’s good with money because he’s made a few mistakes of his own. We all make them. I’m good with money because of the mistakes I made. Plus, he may be able to not only help you, but offer up some advice on how to move forward.

I just wanted to add this publically to Starting Over’s note because I really can’t come clean with my parents. When I said my parents, I was referring to my mother and my stepdad. My stepdad has never really, TRULY liked me most of my life. He and my mom have a kid together, my half sister, who I love dearly. She has been his favorite since the day she was born. (And if you ask her, she’ll admit it. I don’t mean that to sound snotty, because honestly, she isn’t. But she knows she was favored.) My sister has done well with her life, where I have seemed to be the one that always fails. I failed college, and I work a low wage job, and I have never been married. I am not great looking, whereas my sister is thin, blond, cute, and is married to a guy who has a great job. They have new vehicles and just bought a home. My stepdad still reminds me of mistakes I made when I was a young kid…he is most definitely the kind who would boot me out of his life. No questions. He is opinionated and a bunch of other things that aren’t good. But even with all of that, I don’t want to lose that side of the family.

wren

November 10, 2012

Oh my, this is awful. What about talking to your sister and maybe having her come along with you when you speak to your parents? Everyone makes mistakes and your step dad has to realize that no matter his feelings toward you. What you did was foolish, but you did it with good intentions. Maybe your sister’s presence will help.