Sitting in the stands…

It has been a really long day. And I’ve noticed most of my entries begin that way.
Ian is fine. He went home this afternoon. I don’t’ know when he’ll be back at school, but the worry has past. Now, there is just shock and horror… the sequence of events last night is just appalling.
Last Night:
Michael (my mom’s boyfriend) dropped off his son, Ian, with his mother, Debra, at 6pm last night after his weekend visitation. Michael left the McDonalds in Columbus (the court appointed meeting place) and headed back to his home in Houston. Debra and her husband, Terry, drove through the drive-thru, and then began to leave to go home to Georgetown. As they pulled out of the McDonalds parking lot and onto the frontage road of I-10, the vehicle was struck in the rear driver side door. Terry, who was driving, claimed that the driver of the other vehicle didn’t have her lights on (not that anyone believes him… he has two previous DWIs, so I’m not sure. Still, Terry got the ticket.
After the accident, Debra called Kat. Kat is Michael’s twin brother’s EX wife—and one of Debra’s friends. Kat called Paul, Michael’s brother, who in turn called Michael. By the time Michael got the new that his son had been in an accident, he was already back in Houston. If Debra had called Michael first, he could have been back in five minutes. Actually, Debra never even bothered to call Michael at all. Michael had to call her several times to find out what hospital Ian was being taken too. This is why, by the way, I’m done dealing with sociopaths.
When I found out that Ian was being air-lifted to Dell Children’s Hospital, I got in my car and headed up there. I knew it would be several hours before Mom and Michael could make it to Austin, and I didn’t know what kind of shape Debra and Terry were in. I was the first to get there, but after only a few minutes, Terry’s parents showed up.
Terry’s parents are good, salt of the Earth people. And they really don’t much care for Debra. In any case, after Ian had a CT scan, the doctors let us back to see him. He was in a lot of pain, and the nurse couldn’t’ find a vein for the IV, which caused him even more agony. I stood there, holding his little hand in mine, watching him cry in pain, grinding his teeth. He tried to be tough. It broke my heart. I can’t even imagine how I’d do that if it were my child.
After Debra and Terry showed up, the circus began. There’s a lot of back family drama that I don’t really feel the need to get into. Once it was established that Ian was ok, and once Michael got to the hospital and saw his son, I decided to head home.
 
 
Today:
I’m just drained. I feel like someone has rained emotional nukes on me. I find myself tearing up at the strangest times, and then, only for a few minutes. I can’t actually cry, but I start to. It’s bizarre. And I don’t want to do anything. I don’t even want to watch my favorite shows. I just want to take some heavy duty drugs and sleep until Grant comes home.
 
So, this morning I had to cancel my gym session. I was really bummed about that, but I had to finish my tax memo. I was going to write it last night, but then… well, you know. So I spent most of the day researching and working on that. I had to stop in the middle of it to go take my bowling final. It was ridiculous. Why waste the paper? Just give everyone an A and be done with it. It was really that easy. I came back and finished up the memo, but I decided to email it to my professor rather than going in. I know, I know… but I just couldn’t go in. I was so tired. I slept hard last night… I’ve been sleeping hard a lot lately…but I don’t think I’m sleeping well. Anyway, I took a nice long nap after I emailed in my assignment. Afterward, I had some fun with the camera (see the previous entry!).
I did some “GOTH” shots… they didn’t turn out very Goth though… I don’t think I put on enough dark makeup on the eyes. I haven’t worn makeup like that since early high school, so I guess I can’t expect it to turn out perfectly. It was fun anyway… relaxing in a sense. I just wish I weren’t so damn numb…
 
Well, I have the gym in the morning – and come hell or high water, I’m freaking going! So, I’d better get off to bed.
 
SONG OF THE DAY
 
Girl Next Door
 
Small town homecoming queen
She’s the star in this scene
There’s no way to deny she’s lovely
Perfect skin perfect hair
Perfumed hearts everywhere
Tell myself that inside she’s ugly
Maybe I’m just jealous
I can’t help but hate her
Secretly I wonder if my boyfriend wants to date her

She is the prom queen I’m in the marching band
She is a cheerleader I’m sittin in the stands
She gets the top bunk I’m sleepin on the floor
She’s Miss America and I’m just the girl next door

Senior class president
She must be heaven sent
She was never the last one standing
A backseat debutant
Everything that you want
Never too harsh or too demanding
Maybe I’ll admit it
I’m a little bitter
Everybody loves her but I just wanna hit her

She is the prom queen I’m in the marching band
She is a cheerleader I’m sittin in the stands
She gets the top bunk I’m sleepin on the floor
She’s Miss America and I’m just the girl next door
Oh an I’m just the girl next door

I don’t know why I’m feelin sorry for myself
I spend all my time wishin that I was someone else

She is the prom queen I’m in the marching band
She is a cheerleader I’m sittin in the stands
I get A little bit she gets a little more
She’s Miss America and… She’s Miss America
I’m just the girl next door…

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