You’re freaking me out

First: at the grocery store today, an Asian woman behind me in line leaned in and said (about Lexi), "is she Chinese? Is your husband Chinese?" I explained Lexi’s mixed Chinese/Cambodian/we have no idea heritage and that she was adopted. Then the woman starts going off on how GORGEOUS she is and how STUNNING she’s going to be when she grows up and her daddy better get READY for all the  BOYS because she is just so BEAUTIFUL. I don’t mind people complimenting my kid, but she went way over the top.

Then she gives me her life story of how she’s married to someone of Irish heritage and her daughter with him (Asian, mixed race like Lexi) is just GORGEOUS and her husband has to KEEP ALL THE BOYS AWAY. Then she whips out her cell phone and proceeds to show me pictures of her 16 year old daughter, all dolled up in some slinky, sexy mini dress, makeup, hair done, the whole thing.

She was a pretty girl, yes, but, let’s just calm down! She then complains to me how she’s tired of people only noticing and commenting on her daughter’s beauty and outward appearance, that there’s more to her than that. Ummmm, I was thinking, "isn’t that exactly what you’re doing with MY daughter?" 

Then she says, "she was adopted? well, her (birthmother’s) loss, she doesn’t get to see that beauty!"
So, what is she saying? That if Lexi was an ugly child the birthmother would have been happy to get rid of her? That looks are the only thing a birthmother is concerned about when she places for adoption?
 

At that point, I was finished checking out, so just said a breezy, "well, bye, have a nice day" and got out of there!

Second: Lexi goes through phases (that after two years I’m starting to see are kind of normal….) where she’s my normal, wonderful, happy toddler. Then she enters something I call, "JESUS PLEASE HELP ME NOT TO JUST PUT HER ON THE PORCH AND LOCK THE DOOR" mode. She’ll be in this mode for a few weeks, usually when there’s some kind of physical or development milestone or some physical issue like teething. And, then, one morning, back to her normal self for a few months.

We seem to cycle through these normal and "help me LORD" phases regularly.
 

Guess where we are right now. If my front yard was fenced in, yeah, she’d be there. Alone.

I love that little girl more than life itself and would not change being her mom for anything. And at night, when she’s sleeping peacefully, or when she does something really cute, my heart just swells.

But, right now? In this phase? Jimminy Crickets, she’s driving me batty!!

She’ll be two and a half in September. And the tantrums are just….seriously? She has to fulfill the "terrible two’s" cliche? Really?!

Before, when something didn’t go her way, she’d throw what was, what I thought (ha!) a tantrum in the form of a few tears, one little whine and it’d be over. I thought, "huh, tantrums, not that bad!"

Yeah, that was just the warm up.

Because now, so far, when everything doesn’t go her way, it’s WWIII.

Doesn’t get a cookie for breakfast? Tantrum.

I insist on holding her hand in the parking lot? Tantrum.

It’s time to leave the playground? Tantrum.

I put on her Hello Kitty shirt instead of her "I love horses" shirt, which is in the laundry? Tantrum.

It’s time to leave the gymboree class because she’s throwing a tantrum? Another tantrum. ALL. THE. WAY. HOME, complete with kicking the car seat and wailing, "no no no no no no".

The tantrums usually devolve into screaming "no" over and over, crying at top volume, kicking and throwing herself on the floor. So far she’s thrown herself on the floor of the library, gymboree, Target and the Target bathroom (::shudder::). Today at the library was the most recent. I got so annoyed, I said, "mommy’s leaving" and began to walk out. She stayed on the floor, rolling around. I would have left her there too, except some PERFECT mom with PERFECT Dick and Jane kids was all, "oh, look, that baby is tired, her mommy must let her sleep on the floor. Come on, perfect children, let’s go check out our books." Ok, she didn’t say the "perfect children" part, but she DID say the rest.

I swooped in and picked up floor baby so this woman wouldn’t call CPS.

Please let this be over soon. Please.