To Further the Lie
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For the record, I didn’t actually believe a word of the e-mail that Calesha sent me that I posted yesterday. And, as several noters pointed out, even if what she was saying was true, it would still be a pretty bitchy thing to do. But, basically, obviously if she was actually participating in a social experiment she would have made sure that she let me know of the experiment on a timely basis – not after she was already scrambling for a way to justify her behavior. Though I definitely do give her points for creativity.
She actually sent me two e-mails today from “Monique Jones” detailing my results in the “How to Lose a Friend” experiment. Which means that she actually created an e-mail address as another person and tried to create simulated “results.” I don’t even know how to respond to any of it, that she just keeps lying more and more to try to cover up her erratic behavior is just disturbing. It really makes me sad. I know that reading her nonsense is entertaining for you guys (and, honestly, it is for me too), but this is a girl who I’ve dated for a couple of months and who I shared a lot of experiences with. I mean, I ate dinner at her parents’ kitchen table and played her dog! And she’s just such an unassuming person. It’s odd to realize how disturbed she really is.
But yeah, obviously I no longer believe there was never anyone making threatening phone calls to her house. I’ve now assumed that all of the stories she told me that stretched believability were completely fictional. And I really don’t think I can continue even a friendship with her at all at this point. If she finally confessed to all her lies, then, yeah, I think I could actually be capable of being a friend to her still. But I have a feeling she isn’t going to cave on her story anytime soon.
Anyway, I know some of you are probably sick of hearing about this but I’m going to post the “results” e-mail she sent me today just to illustrate how persistent she is in her ludicrous story:
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My name is Monique. I want to thank you for being one of the "victims"
of my project. I’m sorry for causing any, let’s say, tension, between
you and your friend. I simply wanted to test the waters of
relationships.
I won’t go into detail, but I had a small argument with a close friend
of mine and over something I thought was so minor. It had me think, is
this what we have come to? "We" as in our generation as a whole. We
really are so focused on ourselves and how we feel about things that
we don’t take time to think of others. And relationships can fail due
to the most minor things and due to the lack of concern we have. Why
is that? What ever happened to "forgive and forget"? We hold such
gravity-defying grudges, it’s ridiculous. So I figured I would do a
small project, something along the lines of Punk’d, just without
Ashton Kutcher and a camera crew, to show just how easily we can drop
our so-called "friends".
I picked five people at random and assigned their deadly forces. I
wanted to see how easily (and quickly) relationships could end by
means of dishonesty, betrayal, personal attacks, arrogance, and
telling the brutal truth. As you know, your friend chose personal
attacks and from what I’ve heard, it went pretty well. Though
obviously there’s something lacking in your relationship because
according to her, you didn’t think she was telling the truth — that
this was all a test. Which is quite odd. None of the other people who
participated in this social experiment reported anything like this. If
anything, they reported that their subjects were at first a bit weary
but within minutes were outrageously relieved and were very happy that
this back-stabbing and/or rude person they saw in their friend or
lover really did not exist.
So this leads to the question, what is missing in your relationship
with your friend? Trust comes to mind quickly. Perhaps it isn’t
missing, but it doesn’t exist strongly. She stated that you really did
believe her when she lashed out at you, which shows that you do trust
in her to be overly emotional and to act irrationally. However, when
she revealed the truth about it all, you did not believe her. You
don’t trust her in her honesty and loyalty as a friend. You don’t
believe she is capable of telling you the truth when you need it the
most. Or maybe you’ve been wanting to end your friendship with her and
this appeared as your prime opportunity of doing so. Perhaps you
wanted a reason of great magnitude to be upset with her and this
seemed to
be it.
My findings are merely my opinions. This is exactly why I wanted to do
this test. Such a small thing, such as this, can blow a friendship to
pieces. And why? There’s no good reason why anyone should let a good
friend go over small things. We all need to take a good long look at
the relationships we have and evaluate and re- evaluate them. I hope
you understand this project was not done with cruel intentions and was
absoultely not planned to really tear friends apart.
Have a safe night and a blessed Thanksgiving.
Sincerely,
Monique
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Seriously, I keep having to remind myself that she’s making all of this up and that I’m not the crazy one. If nothing else, it’s evidence of how capable some people are of lying. I wonder if she believes it herself. Do any of you readers think there’s a chance there is actually a person named Monique that is conducting this study? Who also happens to sound a lot like Calesha?
Anyway, short of any new Calesha developments that I feel the need to write about, I hope to actually finally finish answering all of your questions tomorrow!
This creeps me out. Serious warnings/red flags/uneasiness about all of it.
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Just plain crazy..
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i would be far too lazy to come up with anything this grandiose. pure craziness! run now.
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It’s scary and annoying that people like Calesha exist and that they really think you’re too stupid to figure out what’s going on. Creepy…. Love, Lidia
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The entire paragraph about your reaction was a bit much. I kind of get the feeling that she’s thinking you want a reason to end your friendship with her. I don’t know. I really am so confused by this girl. And if Monique is real, she’s an ass for making it seem like it’s your fault to not believe her so readily after her “convincing” you that you should jump off of a bridge. Yes, you should send
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Monique an email stating why you find this whole thing a bit ridiculous, and how much you’d love to meet her sometime. Maybe you two would hit it off. Honestly, what was Calesha thinking when she agreed to do it anyway? Strange girl. Maybe she does have a brain tumour. I’m not even completely kidding. Not that I want you fretting about her or anything, but I do worry a bit. – Heather
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P.S. I still think that I’m more concerned for Calesha than afraid of her. You’re capable of taking care of yourself, so I’m not that worried for you, though I do want you to know that you’re not nuts. And you’re handling this all admirably. Now wake up and call me! I can’t even sign on my account because I’m freaked out the virus will hack it and erase everything. I want to read your private entr
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But also the fact that “Monique” took the time to write each “victim” and analyze their response… and tell them what was wrong with their friendship… yea that was too personalized…
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I have a new lap top now! So I can actually get online! Why are you never on AIM??
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wow, it’s almost like she trying to put you through some sort of twisted “test” to see how devoted you are to her. This is so creepy. And I’m so sorry that you have to deal with this Matt. This is just insanity.
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I think this is fascinating, to tell you the truth. That email. Wow. Also, she should have thought of the fact that this random girl who ran into her outside of class one day is not going to give too sharts about you and your relationship/friendship with Calesha. Bleh.
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Well, at least you know where she lives and not vice versa, right?? ~I’ll be
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RYN – Why is it interesting that he didn’t sleep with me? I can’t say what would have happened if he had spent the night…I really don’t want to sleep with people I just met all the time (that’s actually never happened though), but I think he and I got along quite well. Unless that’s why he says he’s a horrible person, and he was just acting. No worries though, really. He’s miles away. ~I’ll be
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Also, don’t forget that I met someone from OK Cupid before Wine Guy, that Chef Guy. And he disappeared off the face of the earth after we met (through no fault of my own). You take the good with the bad. And the two days (eight hours, really) with Boston were good enough to offset the months with Wine Guy (the annoying parts, not the good ones), and the one date with Chef Guy. ~I’ll be
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This girl is crazy…I’m sorry she ended up being insane instead of just a bit nutty like most of us girls.
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Matt, I’ve read all three entries concerning this. As someone who studies language, it appears to me that 1) Calesha is try to be really clever and is psychotic because her prior email and this email sound a bit different. The “Monique” chick sounds a bit more together and her language sounds more intelligent. Calesha’s email that she sent to you…well, it sounds more childish/childlike…like she didn’t realize the extent to what she was doing to you. Or 2) The person is really who she says she is, but even then, I have high suspicions. First thing, if this was an experiment by this “Monique” why didn’t she send a response immediately after Calesha told you. The only reason I think that this might be this girl is because Calesha was “chatting” online with someone on Facebook. If it is this girl, I don’t like how she conducted her study especially afterwards not giving you immediate feedback on what she was planning with Calesha. She should have notified you the same time Calesha did about what they were up to.
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The way that this went down I highly suggest that you cut off ties with Calesha. To me, in Calesha’s prior email, it appeared like she didn’t think about how much this would upset. From her language and expression, it appears that this was nothing more than a game to her. Do you really want to be around someone who has the potential to pull this shit again? Think about it. YouÂ’ve wasted time on her for acting idiotic. LetÂ’s say this was true. All of it. Still, the way that Calesha and “Monique” handled this “project” wasnÂ’t professional or mature. Why did Calesha have to pick you? DidnÂ’t she have some other friends that she could have picked for this experiment? I think that it is absolutely a dumb decision to pick a friend/an involvement that you havenÂ’t know for that long. I think that it would have been better to pick someone who youÂ’ve known for a long time.
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Makes me come to the conclusion that this is all a set up. If it is, stay far away from her as possible. If I was you and she admitted that she had lied about everything to get the truth from you, I wouldnÂ’t be her friend. Trust me, IÂ’ve known people in my life that IÂ’ve disposed of because they played too many damn games. You are an adult, and she is acting like a child, and you donÂ’t have time to put up with her immaturity. She isnÂ’t worth it anymore. You canÂ’t just pull bullshit like she has, and then, she wants to be your friend again. What does she think this is? Fracking second grade! Geez!!!
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Your life is very entertaining…but it is kind of sad for her.
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She needs help. Stay the F*CK away.
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“Take a good look . . .” Sounds familiar. I’m sticking with bizarre.
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i don’t think you have to study languages to see that this email is written in calesha’s style. the diction, the grammar, everything.
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^^I am just implying that since I studied English/Literature for a long time, I can detect easily if someone is writing in the same style. Compared to the two, it appears to the naked eye, at first read, that this may not be Calesha. Yet, the more I think about, the more I suspect that it is her. She has sloppy handiwork first off if you really examine her writing and the time she wrote it. I alsosuspect that she was the one who was giving Matt crow about the anonymous phone calls that she was getting. I think that she was making them. I was trying to give her a small benefit of the doubt, however, she has done too much psychotic shit that if I was Matt I would stop hanging around her. Anyone who has to lie constantly to get attention is someone who isn’t worth your time. What she is doing is unhealthy especially at her age. What makes it further damaging is that you don’t know if she will turn out to be one of those people who will be doing this shit until she is 40 years old! I know some folks are in the late thirties and beyond who still play the type of games that Calesha is doing! I don’t think that Matt wants to wait around and find out that in the future if he can (
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avoid it now!
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I have to agree with Wumpy P. Pancakes. As I was reading the e-mail I thought about how it didn’t sound like Calesha. Just from the brief excerpts of conversation you’ve shown us, I really don’t think Calesha is capable of producing something like this. She didn’t write this e-mail.
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That said, I don’t believe Monique. It sounds too far fetched. Also, I’m not exactly sure it makes sense. And even if it is true, Calesha was a moron to pick you. Reading through the BS, I think they for giggles they decided to mess with people and now they’re realizing maybe that was a really dumb idea. So, now they’re trying to lie their way out of the mess.
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Calesha sounds immature and hurtful. It’s obvious why she picked you. She wanted to see just how far she could go with you and how much you’re willing to put up with. I would just move on if I were you. She does make for a fascinating story though.
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haha “W” means “whatever”, duh. 😉 And dude, the girl who waxed my eyebrows today said she paid $20,000 to go to CS! That’s totally insane! I told her how much it cost in Texas and she said I should go back home for school. haha Dang. Oh, and there’s a health food store like connected to the salon I went into, and randomly I smelt patchouli for fun. In case you were wondering. Oh, but I bought a different oil. (In case you were wondering that too.) Have a good day, kbye! 🙂
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OMG about Calesha, btw.
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Well, even if Monique Jones didn’t sound exactly like Calesha… This is will be a great story in the future, though. PS: Sorry I didn’t call you back yesterday, I fell asleep at 7pm and didn’t wake up until, um, 10am. Well, I didn’t get much sleep Sunday night, and I have a cold! I’ll call you today. Love, etc.
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crazy crazy crazy crazy wingnut. I say no more contact. That biz is a loose cannon.
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