Convincing
I’ve gotten several (mostly private) notes over the last few entries saying that I should “fight” for Heather more and I’m sorta puzzled by them. People just seem unable to grasp that you don’t convince others to like you. Not to mention that the idea of one partner convincing the other to be in the relationship and the implied debt involved is such that, even if the convincing worked, it wouldn’t be worth it.
I’ve written about some of this before, but it amuses me just how little people seem to know about attraction and human interaction. I blame those romantic comedies where the guy chases after the girl for the duration only to finally convince her to requite his feelings. In real life, obsessively chasing after someone who isn’t interested in you is called stalking, not romance.
On a side note, these are all just general observations and aren’t directly related to Heather and me or anything. Yes, that’s right, it’s applicable to all of you. In fact, I’ve likely just saved you $50 on a membership to howtopickupchicks.com. You can thank me later.
my friend’s dad had to talk his mom into marrying him … chased her for years. They are still together, but i can’t help but think … maybe he wasn’t “the one.” i don’t want to have to be convinced and am happy you realize the obsurdity of the thought that we might need to be.
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There is always pursuing. You’re dangerously close to getting them confused. Stop thinking you’re so undesirable and that you have to convince people to like you. Maybe they do and aren’t as forthcoming and need a little pursuing. And maybe that’s the only difference between pursuing and convincing – how you view yourself.
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Do you think if you pointed Heather in the direction of this entry you’d save her from trying on her 10th persona to try and convince me to like her? And yes, that type of girl does always want to be chased (yeah, or purchased), and will always present themselves as a commodity. Don’t lower yourself.
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to me, love is obsession anyway. maybe it’s better i stay generally uninterested, yeah?
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ryn: Bleh, I know. I just haven’t felt like writing lately…but I’ll try and update later today. Just for you.
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Yes, I couldn’t feel satisfied feeling like I made myself into what my boy of choice likes by convincing them to want me and such. But I agree with Heather. There must be some persuing. But yes, I don’t think that’s what’s lacking in this situation…
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In real life, obsessively chasing after someone who isnÂ’t interested in you is called stalking, not romance. Golden words that should be blatantly apparent, yet somehow aren’t.
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So, yeah… you recently scolded me for not noting your entries. I suppose due to our limited interaction as of late (or as of, like, the past year or so), you really have no way of knowing if I read what you write. Well, be content knowing I am fully caught up to this point. And I shall note again… -K
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Thanks for your input regarding the email. Sadly I’m inclined to agree with you. I regret so few decisions I make, but I think that I chose a poor moment to make one of those. Hopefully, “what it comes across as” will go unnoticed, and “what I was going for” will shine through. It’s been a couple days, and I usually get immediate responses so it’s not looking good. Wish me luck.
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F you. I stick by my private notes. 😀 And unlike your observations, my advice comes from actual life, instead of movies. Cause my life does not revolve around movies. Mm hmm. *smacks you in the head* No giving up! Not allowed! This is the Goddess!
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[ryn: I don’t know, either. It mostly makes me sad.] Kaia, one half of
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Hm…the idea of “fighting” for someone makes me uneasy. When did love become so complicated, and how the hell is devotion synonymous with persistence? I’ll have to read more entries to have an idea about your situation, but I opt for finding someone who is smitten enough with you that you don’t have to prove yourself through trials and tribulations…
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