Life as a Genius

There are problems with being a genius. You see, throughout my life, my learning functions have been so accelerated that I’ve often missed out on the simpler things. So, yes, while I’ve long ago discovered, for example, the meaning of existence, I have not yet learned many more basic functions.
 
I can not swim. Nor can I ride a bicycle, do my laundry, or tell the difference between a ferret and a parrot. These are merely examples.
 
Of course, Heather finds my inability to do elementary functions to be enormously funny (as if she’s the picture of normality) and has decided that she will teach me many during the week I’m in California. It’s just another example of our relationship working in reverse. In a sense it’s like learning to speak again, my mouth sloppily smacking me’s, my tongue sighing the letter I.
 
Ahem. See, she’s rubbing off on me already.

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that is hilarious. you dont know how to swim?!?!

July 28, 2006

You don’t know how to swim or ride a bike? What planet have you been living on?!

You know how they say you can’t forget how to ride a bicycle? I proved them wrong! I wish you luck in learning all of these things with Heather and that you do so with minimal injury.

July 28, 2006

My sister’s pretty similar in that way. She’s by no means a genius, but she could kick anyone’s ass when it comes to history, philosophy, poetry etc.. But she didn’t know what a ferret was. Just like you. She does know how to swim though..luckily. Later days, Steph

July 28, 2006

what a poignant entry! you’ll have fun in california. 🙂 a ferret is kind of like a groundhog? laundry – pour in one scoop of detergent and then a load of coloreds that don’t bleed and whites. biking, you can learn. when do you leave? ryan

hmm, now that’s something to think about. i think we often overlook that aspect, which can really lead to some major problems. as being the sister of a self proclaimed genius, i know this all too well. yes, my sister is very smart, but at times can be socially retarded. she also lacks street smarts. and during these times i feel very lucky. i don’t think i’d trade my smarts for hers any day.

but the thinks that make us “normies” normal aren’t all too difficult to pick up, they just take time to perfect. be happy with who you are, and the rest will fall into place. have fun in cali, and be happy for the oppertunity. have a great day~ X)

July 30, 2006

fuck, if you start talking like her you’re off the sex entries I know you enjoy so much.

As a response to the other notes, what’s wrong with not knowing how to swim?!?! I mean…it’s not as if one day all the ice caps will mysteriously melt, and we’ll all be forced to live with the dolphins (until they kill us all)? Woah! Too much sugar.. Sorry.

But seriously… go for it. Have fun learning about all the banal things humanity has created in order to pass time… After all, in 40 years time, you won’t be able to swim without catching pneumonia, or ride a bike without fear of breaking a hip…

July 30, 2006

Yes, I can help with the swim lessons. Oh and that is quite a good Heather impression.

August 1, 2006

“So you finally know a character from a Bret Easton Ellis novel.” Hah, yeah, I’ll give you that. Andy is a southerner of course.

August 2, 2006

ryn: Hey, I felt like this before I took that evil woman’s class, so there.